Almost Lover
by Faded Galaxia
Summary: Prequel/semi-sequel to Mixed Emotions. The story of how the most unexpected couple came to be.
1. Prologue

**A/N: DUN DUN DUUUNNN**

**And so, I left you with a randomly ending chapter and a cliffhanger of an epilogue. Now, I could have been totally mean and left the story as is, but I don't feel like I told everything I could.**

**Plus, the ending chapter kind of pissed me off. It didn't work like I wanted it to. I'm proud of the epilogue, but the ending chapter…meh. So, I'm going to be weaving some things from the previous story into this one. All of the stuff in the 'future' will be in italics, so you'll definitely be able to tell when the time and the point of view switches. If it's too confusing, let me know. I'll fix it up. ^_^**

**Oooo, I've never finished a story before! I'm on a total adrenaline rush. Yay.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own really any of this stuff. Just kind of…borrowing it and twisting it in a way that makes me happy. Everyone in Harry Potter deserves to be happy, dang it!**

**…Oh, and it might be a good idea to read 'Mixed Emotions' first. You might not get some stuff.**

**Prologue  
**

_"Holy motherfucking shit! Lorissa! Annemarie!" I screamed, my voice echoing off of the crumbling wood walls. "Get in here! Now! I need help!"_

_There he was, lying there in front of me. Snape. Severus. Fucking. Snape. There was no mistaking who it was. In regular circumstances, this wouldn't have been too surprising, since 1) this was his house, and 2) he was rather mopey. _

_But, since everyone had said he'd been dead for the past four months…well, that puts a different perspective on things._

"_Oh my God, Professor? Professor? Hey, wake back up!" I shook his shoulder, trying to get him to open his eyes again. Nothing. "Help! Call 911!"_

"_God, what?" Lorissa said as she casually strolled in the room. "We heard you drop the books, what's wrong with-oh my God." Her hands flew up to her face when she saw the mass that was Snape. "Who is that?"_

"_Never mind that right now, call 911!" I yelled, still shaking him, trying to get some sort of voluntary movement out of him._

"_We're in England! It's not 911!" Lorissa started pacing around, her hands flailing everywhere. "Oh my God! Oh my God!"_

"_God Damnit, Lorissa, go get your mom!" Lorissa ran out of the room, screaming for Annemarie. I was still getting nothing when she came back in, pulling her mother by the hand over to the Bates Motel chair._

"_Okay, what's going on?" Annemarie wrenched her hand out of Lorissa's grip, shooting her the famous 'Carter glare'. "You all need to stop screaming. You'll wake the neighborhood."_

_Snape let out a soft whimper. "Finally!" I yelled, still shaking him. "Come on, wake up!"_

"_What the hell?" It finally clicked in her head what was going on. "Move!" She pushed me out of the way, flocking to Snape's side. I landed in the fireplace with a lovely 'thud', sending a cloud of nasty ash everywhere. I opened my mouth to complain, but the words were lost on my tongue when I looked up._

_There they were - the couple that I could never believe; the couple that I could never fathom, together again after almost fifteen years. Annemarie held onto Snape's right hand, stroking his forehead with her free hand, asking him to wake up with the calmest, most serene voice I had ever heard come out of a person. Her face was a river of tears, however, so I knew she wasn't completely calm._

"_One of you has your cell phones on you, right?" She asked, her voice wavering slightly._

"_I do," Lorissa said, whipping it out of her jeans pocket._

"_Call 999. Tell them to come to Spinner's End. Emphasize that it's urgent."_

~*~

I never went to the library. Ever. I thought it smelled like old people and moldy books, especially the farther back you went. Dust covered almost every inch of the place. It was dark and full of cobwebs. You couldn't talk loud and, for me, a boisterous sixteen year old with lots to say, that was a very difficult thing for me to not be able to do. All in all, I avoided the library at all costs.

If Stacie had not needed to find a book on reading tealeaves for her Divination class, we would have never ventured into the dark corner of the library. We would have never sat down at that long cherry wood table in desperate need of a new coat of stain. We would have never gone through the book, gotten bored, and decided to talk in hushed voices about Paul McCartney's most recent album. We would have never gotten in a heated discussion about who's solo work was better – John's or Paul's.

I would have never asked the boy across the table from us his own opinion.

I would probably have never met Severus Snape.

But, the universe had something else planned.

~*~

"_Press To Play_ sucked more than anything I have ever heard," I whispered to Stacie Avery, my best friend of 5 years. Signaling she had given up on studying by closing _The Joy of Tealeaves, _she shot a glare at me that sent chills up my spine.

"Oh, yeah, Annemarie, and _Two Virgins_ was a musical masterpiece."

"At least John didn't make 'Stranglehold'. That song is all over the place. It's blues, and then pop, and then…hell, I don't even know. It makes no musical sense."

"Okay, then," Stacie said, flicking a lock of her long, blonde hair over her shoulder. "So John's solo stuff always made perfect sense."

I shook my head. "No, not always. It always flowed better than Paul's, though, and _Press To Play_ just further proves that point."

"'How Do You Sleep'?"

"'Silly Love Songs'?"

"'God'?"

"Again, 'Silly Love Songs'?"

"So what? The public loved it. Just because your Beatle couldn't write a chartable tune doesn't mean that mine shouldn't have been able to."

I shook my head, running a hand through my bushy, strawberry-blonde mane. "You have got to be kidding me. 'Instant Karma'? Hello? That was all over the radio!"

"Ssshhh!" the librarian, a crinkly old woman, directed towards us. I hadn't realized how loud we had gotten. Looking around, I noticed people were looking at us.

I leaned closer to Stacie. "Okay, we need a third party for this."

"Agreed." She pointed across the table. "How about that kid?"

Squinting in the dark, I could barely make out the silhouette of the person she was referencing. "Are you sure there's someone there?"

"Man, your eyes are bad. Ask them."

Stealing a glance at the librarian, I leaned over the table as discretely as I could. "Hey! Hey you!"

I felt eyes on me, though I couldn't see them.

"Yeah, hi. Listen, my friend and I here," I pointed to Stacie, "are having a heated discussion about something, and we need a third party to help us out."

No answer. The eyes were still on me, though. A shiver went through my spine.

"All right…so, in your opinion, whose solo work is better – John Lennon's or Paul McCartney's?"

The person put their book down and leaned in towards me. A sliver of light fell on him – a boy, probably 16, like me, with shoulder length black hair, pale skin, and piercing black eyes. "You want my opinion?" he said in a low baritone.

I nodded, swallowing thickly. He didn't blink.

"Well, then, I would say neither. John and Paul make fine music themselves, but George Harrison's solo work is clearly the best. He was always the true talent behind the Beatles. His music is the kind that, if given the opportunity, can make the world a better, more enjoyable place." He leaned back, obscuring himself once more in darkness. "Anything else?"

"No…no, I think we're good." I looked at Stacie, whose eyes were so big that I though they were going to pop out of her head. "Thanks. Come on, Stace." I grabbed her wrist and dragged her away. I heard him chuckle softly as we speed walked out of the library.

"What the hell **was** that?" Stacie asked after we collapsed into the big cushy chairs in the Ravenclaw common room. Stacie and I had met on the train to Hogwarts when we were both 11. We promised to be best friends, even if we were sorted into different houses. Luckily, though, we were both sorted into Ravenclaw. Ever since then, we had been practically inseparable.

I shook my head. "No idea."

"I bet he was a Slytherin."

"Stacie!" I threw a pillow at her. She let out an 'ow'. "That's mean. You shouldn't judge people like that."

"Oh, whatever. You do it too," she put the pillow under her head and sunk down in the chair. "You know how they all are. I've never met a Slytherin I liked."

"For your information, my mom was a Slytherin."

She sat up. "Nuh uh. Really?"

"No."

Stacie threw the pillow back at me. "You're such a shit sometimes."

"I know."

"Yeah, well, they all judge us, so why shouldn't we judge them right back? Double standard much?" She stretched and yawned, pulling out her maroon headband and shaking out her shoulder-length blonde hair. "Anyways, I'm going to bed. Night, chica. Don't let the creepy Slytherins bite."

I threw the pillow back at her as she headed up the stairs. I turned my attention to the crackling fireplace. The heat in the room slowly made me fall asleep, and I spent the night dreaming of burning black eyes.

**A/N: Prologue! Yay! I'm so excited to write this…Happy happy fun times. The rest of the chapters will be better than this one, I promise. And, just so you are completely clear:**

**_Italics = Krystel_**

**Normal = Annemarie.**

**Love you guys! Read and review!**


	2. Chapter 1

**A/N: So I need to do something quiet in order to take my mind off of my boyfriend not calling me after he said he was leaving his house to make the hour and a half trek down here, and to keep my roomie from hating me for being really loud.**

**So, Imma work on my new story. Yay. ^_^**

**Love you all!**

**Disclaimer: Nope. Don't own it. Wish I did. Everyone deserves to be happy, dang it.**

**Chapter 1  
**

_"Please, Sev…don't do this to me again…please…"_

~*~

"So, I met this guy yesterday," I said, hands in my robe pockets. Ben Koromashi, my best guy friend of 4 years, and I decided to take a walk around the courtyard to ease our beginning of the year stressors. With his less-than stellar Transfiguration OWL score, and my own in Divination, we were both feeling the pressure of bringing up our marks. I could tell he was freaking out – when he got stressed, he would bunch his eyebrows together so much that little red lines would form across his olive skin.

"Oh, really?" He rose up his eyebrows, almond eyes sparkling. Ben and I had talked about dating our fourth year, but mutually decided that it would just be 'too awkward and gross'. We were practically brother and sister. The idea of kissing that face repulsed me.

Not because he wasn't an attractive kid. Oh no. He was cute. It was just the fact that it was…well…_Ben._

"Mmmhmmm." We sat down on the hill overlooking the lake. It was a gorgeous mid-September day - not too hot, not too cold. Large, fluffy clouds floated through the air against a bright blue sky. "It was a really random meeting, too."

"Do tell."

"Well…" I started gesticulating with my hands, "Okay, so I didn't exactly meet him. But, I talked to him."

"Name?"

I sighed. "No idea."

Ben smacked his hand against his forehead. "You really need to stop doing that."

"I'm sorry!" I put my hands up. "I know, it's horrible. You know how I am, though. I'm not good with guys."

"Okay, then," he lay back, putting his hands behind his head. "Describe him for me. Most likely, I'll either know him or know of him."

Ben was blessed with the ability to fit into any clique at Hogwarts. I myself considered myself lucky to be able to fit in with Stacie and him. I didn't have many friends – pretty much them and my cousin in America, Grace.

Ben also gossiped more than the average twelve-year-old girl. He was always the one to get information from.

"Okay," I assumed the same position he was in. I noticed a cloud that looked like a bell pepper directly above me. "Well, he had black hair, dark eyes, really pale…kinda dark…"

"Ooo, not good," He rolled over on his side and pointed a finger in my face. "I know exactly who that is. Not good."

"Who is it?"

"He's this creepy kid Lily Evans used to hang out with. His name's Severus. I know, right?" He said after I gave him a look of 'Who would name their child that?' "Anyways, really strange kid. He's a Slytherin, though I'm sure you already guessed that. Gave off the whole…Slytherin vibe, didn't he?"

I nodded. "Yeah, but I didn't want to judge. Stacie assumed it right away."

"Stacie saw him, too?"

"Yeah. We were both in the library, talking about the Beatles. We got him to chime in."

"Huh." There was a pause.

"What?" I poked him in the arm.

"Did he say anything to her?"

"No. Why, should he have?"

"Oh, no. He's just…well…one of _those _Slytherins."

"Oh, God." I knew what he was talking about. The whole blood thing. Stacie was a Pureblood. I had heard that the people who cared about blood status could actually smell if someone was Pureblood or not. "No, he didn't say anything to her. He just talked to me."

"Maybe that's a sign to you." I had no idea if I were a Pureblood or not. My mom was, but, in her wonderful way of explaining things, told me when I was 14 that I had been 'conceived at Woodstock', and that's why she had no idea who my father was.

Yeah. Thanks mom. Just the image I wanted to have – you jacked up on acid doing every guy in sight to the tune of "See Me, Feel Me" by the Who. Gag.

"Yeah, maybe."

"I'd stay away from him if I were you. He's an asshole. You heard what he did to Lily last year, didn't you?"

"Nope." Once again, gossip queen.

"Oh my God, I don't know how you couldn't have. He called her the 'm' word."

I froze. Not much could offend me – I mean, seriously, Richard Pryor and George Carlin were my favorite comedians – but that word made me absolutely furious. It didn't matter if I knew the person or not; if I heard it, I went psychotic.

"I'm going to kill him!" I tried to jump up, but Ben had wisely rolled over and pinned me down by my arms.

"Damn, I forgot. I shouldn't have told you that."

"Let go of me!" I struggled against his hold for about two minutes before finally giving up. I sighed. "I'm going to give him a piece of my mind."

"No, you're not. It wouldn't make any difference."

"Maybe it would, Ben. You never know. Someone needs to get through to those…those…"

"Assholes?" A smirk started tugging at his lips.

"Exactly."

We stayed like that for a few more minutes.

"Annemarie?"

"Hmm?" I found myself lost in his dark brown eyes.

"Remind me again why we're not dating."

I laughed. "Because it would be incest, silly."

~*~

Stacie and I sat in our bedroom, the soundtrack to the musical "Phantom of the Opera" blaring in the background. The Averies were musical nuts, so she had a massive collection of musical records. We had listened to nearly every one, but this one was by far our favorite.

"Night time sharpens, heightens each sensations/darkness wakes and stirs imagination/silently the senses abandon their defenses/helpless to resist the notes I write/for I compose the music of the night…" Neither of us could sing, but we belted the song anyways. Soft little skips were beginning to form during the music from how much we listened to it.

"You guys are ridiculous," Samantha Morris, our other roommate, said as she came in, plopping on her bed. We kind of just tolerated her. "You really should listen to something else. The singer sounds like a chipmunk."

"No he doesn't!" We said at the same time.

"The Phantom is a beautiful entity. He can sing however he wants." I leaned back against my pillows and closed my eyes, letting the music flow through my ears. It was no secret to Stacie that, to me, Christine should have picked the Phantom. She let the whole 'I'm-obsessed-with-you-so-I'm-going-to-kidnap-you-and-practically-rape-you' thing get to her, leading her to believe that Raoul was the best one for her.

Whatever. The Phantom was sexy…dark and mysterious. I wanted my own Phantom.

Speaking of dark and mysterious…

"Oh my God, Stacie! I forgot to tell you. Remember the creepy guy we talked to a few days ago?"

She nodded, her hands flowing through the air as 'Music Of The Night' ended.

"Well, I talked to Ben, and I found out some stuff about him…like how he called Lily Evans the 'm-word' last year."

Both girls turned around with large eyes. "That was him?" They said in unison.

"You guys knew about it?"

"Yeah, it was all over the school." Samantha opened up her own copy of _The Joy of Tealeaves_ and started to kind of study. "You really are out of the loop, Annemarie."

I ran a hand through my hair in embarrassment. "Yeah, I guess so. Anyways, that makes me so mad I could scream. I mean, he's a Beatles fan! What kind of Beatle fan does something so mean?"

"Charlie Manson's a Beatles fan," Samantha tapped her pencil on her book. Stacie and I just glared at her. "What? It's the truth. He is."

"Not helping."

"Well, P.M, please, don't do anything drastic." 'P.M.' was Stacie's nickname for me, since the initials in my first name are A.M., and I'm TOTALLY not a morning person. "I've seen you deal with that word. It's not pretty."

"Didn't you shove some Slytherin into the wall last year because of it?"

I nodded with a smirk. Blondie didn't stand a chance. "Yeah, I did. It just makes me so angry, you know? If I see him…God, I don't know what I'll do."

"Just don't be crazy," Samantha closed her book and walked towards the door. "I'm going to the common room. Can't take the chipmunk voice." She closed the door behind her.

'I hope I won't be…'

~*~

So, what was I?

Crazy.

"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?" I shouted across the hall when I saw him a few days later, standing in a group of snooty Slytherins. Figures he'd be with them.

"Severus, I think she's talking to you," one of the girls said, pointing a perfectly manicured nail my way. He turned around, an indescribable gleam in his eye.

"WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?" My black flats echoed off the high ceilings in the hallway. I practically stomped cracks in the floor by the time I got close to him. "Well, are you going to answer me?"

"Considering I have no idea what this is about, no." He turned back around towards the group, shaking his head.

"Hey." I tapped him on the shoulder. "I was talking to you."

His black eyes burned into my hazel ones. If I hadn't been in my mode, I would have probably started crying, but it didn't faze me at that moment. "What is it that you want, exactly?"

I edged closer to him, until we were practically touching noses. He had a big nose. "You need to know that a lot of us don't appreciate when people like you call others terrible things," I squinted my eyes, trying to block out the blaze coming from his. "And you need to know that if I hear about you doing it again, I will seriously scoop your eyes out with my bare hands." With that, I spun around and strutted off.

In the matter of three seconds, my arm was practically ripped out of its socket, and I was face to face with the extremely pissed off Slytherin. "I don't care what it is you want from me, but I would appreciate it if you wouldn't confront me in public." 'Appreciate' was practically a snarl. I felt my eyes widen a little but, but I maintained my composure.

"Public embarrassment is the only way to get through to you people."

He let go of my arm and, with one final glare in my direction, walked off in a huff. I smirked to myself and walked the other way, doing circles with my arm to get it back in its rightful place.

~*~

"He's staring at you," Stacie said, pointing towards the Slytherin table at lunch. I started to turn around to see. "No, don't look. What did you do?"

"I told him off, is all." I ignored Stacie's advice and turned around. Sure enough, he was staring at me, but not with anger. He looked more pensive, as if he was deep in thought about me. It sent a creepy chill down my spine. "Besides," I turned back to face her, stabbing a forkful of green beans and putting them in my mouth, "he can stare all he wants. I'm sure he thinks I'm totally sexy."

She rolled her eyes, pointing her own forkful of green beans in my direction. "He's probably wondering about the whore rumors that Ben started."

"I heard my name?" Ben said, as if on cue. He placed himself next to a disgruntled 5th year girl, who instantly changed her attitude when she saw him. She softly said a hello to him, and then turned to her friends and started to giggle.

"Yeah, just talking about the rumors you started."

"Oh, about P.M. being a whore?" He helped himself to my roll. I playfully punched him in the arm.

"And why aren't you at your own table?"

"Bored," he said with his mouth full of bread. "Sirius is going on about his exploits. Heard it all before. Figured I'd come over here for some stimulating conversation."

"Well, Annemarie went psycho on creepy guy, and he's staring in this direction."

"What?!" Ben whipped around so fast that it nearly knocked the 5th year out of her seat. He turned back around slowly. "And so he is. What did you do?"

"I just told him what was on my mind." I smiled. "You know what I say to those people, you've seen it."

"Did you tell him you were going to scoop out his eyeballs?"

I nodded. "Of course."

Ben put his head down on the table. "Oh God. You would."

"Well, yeah. That's my favorite line for them," I stole a glance behind me again. He was still staring, but, this time, he caught the fact that I was looking at him. He quickly looked down at his plate, and then to his left.

"Ha ha, he saw me looking at him," I said in victory. A part of me wondered what he was thinking about. I mean, he could have been looking at me out of spite. That's what I figured he was doing, anyways. But, there was also the slim chance that he had been looking at me for some other reason. Like I was pretty or something.

I shook my head. Dang thoughts. They always seemed to get me into trouble.

~*~

_"Daaaaad!" I yelled into Lorissa's phone. The four of us – Snape included – had been piled into the back of the ambulance (Snape was, of course, on a stretcher), and were currently racing down some unknown street towards some unknown Muggle hospital. "You need to call Lorissa's phone ASAP. We're in a huge pickle. Hey," I stopped, putting my hand over the receiver, "what hospital are we going to?"_

_"Holy Cross," the paramedic said, looking at me like I knew nothing._

_"I'm American, sorry," I took my hand off of the receiver. "We're going to Holy Cross hospital in Surrey. Please call us back. Love you, bye." I sighed and looked down at Severus. Annemarie was still stroking his head, tears welling up in her eyes. His coloring was a mixture of green and purple. Not pretty._

_Lorissa, Annemarie, and I dashed out of the ambulance as they wheeled Snape in. We were told to wait in the lobby, to which Annemarie played the husband card. They let her go back with them, which left Lorissa and I alone._

_"Do you think he's going to be okay?" Lorissa asked, looking down at her hands. She looked really pale – even paler than usual._

_"I don't know, honey," I said, grabbing one of her hands. "I hope so."_

**A/N: YAY!! ^_^**

**I know this one is short, but I'm at a bit of a stand still with my thought processes…It will come back, I know it will, and the chapters will be longer.**

**Love you guys!!**


	3. Chapter 2

**A/N: Double yay! I have time during English today (when I should be working on a research paper…heh…) to write, so I'm going to crank out a chapter here and (hopefully) one in my Willy Wonka story.**

**Which you all should read, too. I like it a lot.**

**Anyways, on with the chapter!**

**Chapter 2**

"I saw you looking at me yesterday," I said, sliding in next to Severus the next day. I hadn't realized he was in my Potions class until I saw him, sulking in the corner. Stacie gave me a look of 'what the hell are you doing' from across the room, but I just smiled and waved.

"You were mistaken," he said as he gathered his books to leave. I grabbed his arm.

"No, no. You're not going anywhere." He turned around and glared at me, but relented, spreading his books back out again. "So why were you looking at me yesterday?"

"I told you, I wasn't. You must have been seeing things." Slughorn began to drawl on about something Potions related. I never was a fan of that class – Astrology was always my thing. I loved being up in the tower at 11 o clock at night, staring at the stars and feeling incredibly small in the span of the universe.

"Nope, I wasn't, because Stacie and Ben both saw me." I paused. "You know, my friends."

"I'm guessing they're the only ones you have?"

I scoffed…even though it was totally true. "Like you have any."

"Oh, that really hurt," he said, his words dripping with sarcasm. "Are you making it your job to torture me or something?"

"Maybe." I put my chin on my hand and batted my eyelashes at him. "Or maybe I'm secretly in love with you."

He shook his head and started to gather his books again. "You're really starting to irritate me."

"Not my fault you can't take a joke." He moved to the next table over, where some blonde Slytherin was sitting. I could hear them whispering to each other, no doubt about how annoying that Ravenclaw girl was. Heh. Mission accomplished.

"What were you doing today?" Stacie asked me after class, looking completely panicked. "You know he could totally hex you or something!"

"Nothing. Just felt like being annoying," I said, tossing my bushy hair behind my shoulders. I needed a haircut. "I just wanted to know why he was looking at me. He really doesn't take a joke well. Besides, maybe I'll be a good influence on him."

"Not if he curses you," She stopped in front of me in the hallway. I heard kids behind me saying things like 'hey, move!' and 'Watch where you're standing'. "Listen, I don't know what you're thinking, but you know, as well as everyone else in this school, that the other three houses should stay away from the Slytherins."

I laughed. "There are nice people in that house, Stace. They're not all bad."

"Yeah, maybe, but the kid you keep picking on is not one of them." She sighed, snaking her arm into mine. "You really need to be careful with who you pick your fights with."

"_We're _not fighting; he's completely indifferent towards me. I'm the one who's fighting, and it's for something I believe in."

"Whatever. Just be careful." We walked the rest of the way to our common room in silence.

~*~

_"I came as soon as I got your message," Dad said as he ran over to Lorissa and me. We were both sitting in the lobby, holding each other's hands. She had started to cry, and I was comforting her. "What is going on?"_

_I looked up at my father. His eyes were huge with worry. "Snape's alive."_

_"WHAAAT?!" He took a step back, and then ran over to me, getting down on his knees. "How is that…what?! That can't be right. He was dead. Harry said he was dead."_

_"Well, dad, either I stumbled on his twin at his house, or it's him. Annemarie is in the hospital room with him right now. We haven't heard anything yet, so we have no idea what's going on."_

_"I saw him, too," Lorissa piped in softly. "He looked like the pictures I saw of him."_

_"Jesus Christ," Dad ran a hand through his hair. "This is…wow. I have to call Stacie." He whipped out his phone and started dialing a fury of numbers. He walked over to the other side of the room so we couldn't hear his conversation._

_Just then, I looked up and noticed someone rather familiar checking with the receptionist. She pointed over in my direction. He turned around and smiled._

_"Harry!"_

~*~

I threw my Transfiguration book up against the wall and let out a huge groan. I had been working on the same problem for an hour, and had gotten nowhere with it.

"Frustrated much?" Stacie said as she picked up my book and gave it back to me. I collapsed on my bed. She started laughing. "Oh, girl, you make me laugh. Let's go take a walk or something. Clear your mind."

I curled up in my pillow. "No, I think I'll just stay here and take a nap. My bed is really comfy right now."

She shrugged and turned back to her Divination homework. "Suit yourself."

The next thing I knew, it was 10:30 at night. Stacie and Samantha were both asleep – Stacie with her Divination book lying across her body. I looked over at my Transfiguration book, knowing that I should work on the problem…but opted to take a walk around the school instead.

Walks around Hogwarts were always very risky, especially at night. Filch was very hardcore with his security position; if he saw anyone out past 9, he'd practically have us expelled. I have to say, it was always much more fun with someone else there, but I didn't want to wake Stacie up for a walk that she had asked me about 5 hours before.

Using the sneaking around techniques that I had learned from my infinite viewings of The Breakfast Club, I cautiously wound my way towards the big Astronomy tower. There were two towers – the big one and the smaller one. The big one was nice because it was, well, big, and it had more telescopes. There was one in particular that I always used, just because it was typically pointed in the direction of Orion – even if Orion wasn't always visible. Orion was my favorite constellation, since it was the first one that I was ever able to identify. Taking extremely light steps, I tiptoed my way over to said telescope and looked out.

"It's past time to be out," a voice said from the dark. It was Severus. I would have recognized that snarl anywhere.

"I could be telling you the same thing, Severus." I looked at Orion again, ignoring the fact that he was walking over towards me.

"How is it that you know my name? I don't feel like we've ever been properly introduced." He looked out of the telescope that was next to me.

"I asked around."

"Ah," he replied, looking over at me. I could feel his eyes burning holes into my cheeks. "I tried that with you. No one seems to know you exist."

I laughed. "That doesn't surprise me."

"Are you a figment of my imagination, then?"

"Nope. I'm real. Annemarie Carter."

"Pleasure, I suppose." He turned back to his telescope. "So what brings you up here this late at night?"

"Again, I could ask you the same question." I said with a smirk.

"I have permission to be up here at all hours of the night. I assume you do not."

"No. I just like to come up here."

"Well, then," he started, smirking the whole time, "as a Prefect of the Slytherin house, I'm going to have to turn you in."

I gasped. He was a Prefect? Shit. "You wouldn't!"

"Oh, I would. Especially since I really don't like you."

I started to pace. "Okay, seriously, I'll leave. You don't have to turn me in. I won't be out past 9 again. Just don't turn me in." Ben had told me some things about being turned in to Filch…and I really did not want to deal with any sort of beating. "Please". I gave him a puppy dogface. He looked at me, and then turned away. I thought I saw a little bit of color in his face.

"On one condition."

"Sure, anything."

"You leave me alone."

Something in me jerked. I didn't want to leave him alone. "Fine," I said, turning to walk out, "I'll leave you alone."

"Thank you. If Filch catches you, tell him that I said you could be out right now."

"Whatever," I shuffled down the stairs back to my room.

"Where'd you go?" Stacie said from one of the cushy chairs in the common room. I jumped when she spoke. I didn't think anyone was up.

"Out," I said, walking up the stairs to our room.

She began to follow me. "Did you go on a walk without me?"

I nodded. "Yeah. It was short."

"Where'd you go?"

"What are you, my mom?" I fluffed my pillow before crashing my face into it.

"Touchy, touchy." She got very close to my squished face. "Were you out with a guy?"

"Kind of," I said through my pillow. Stacie grabbed my shoulders and yanked me on my side.

"Do tell!"

"Well, I ran into Severus up in the Astronomy Tower-"

"Eew! You were out with him?!"

"No!" I threw my pillow at her, and then quickly retrieved it. "He just happened to be up there when I was up there. Turns out he's a prefect. He almost turned me in."

"How'd you get out of it?"

"I promised I'd leave him alone," I said with a sigh.

"And you don't want to leave him alone because…"

"I don't know!" I slammed my face back in my pillow. "He intrigues me, maybe. I guess." I sighed again, this time with a growl. "I don't know."

"Don't tell me you want to change him." She patted my hair, and then left to go to her bed. "Get some sleep. Maybe it will clear your head."

"Yeah, maybe so," I said, pulling my covers over my head. I wanted my head to clear up. I wanted to go back to normal…but something about him made me want to scream.

And not in a bad way.

~*~

I ignored Severus for the next month, which was hard to do, considering I saw him EVERYWHERE I WENT. It was as if he was purposefully stalking me, trying to get me to slip up, break my promise, and give him some sort of excuse to get me into trouble.

Arriving late to Potions one day (I thought I had gotten l lucky – Slughorn wasn't paying attention. He was so in to his lecture that he had closed his eyes and had started rocking back and forth.), I found that every seat but one was taken.

Guess who it was next to.

I shot a glare at Stacie, who sent me an "I-tried-to-save-the-seat-for-you" look. I sighed and took the seat, making sure I sat as far away from him as I could. I saw him look at me from the corner of my eye, and then smirk. I wanted to strangle him.

"Miss Carter, nice of you to join us," Slughorn said, putting a hand on my shoulder. "I'm assuming this is not going to be a habitual occurrence?"

"No, sir," I said, rather monotone. I could tell Severus was looking at me, with that stupid smirk on his face. "It will not be one."

"Good. Then pay attention." He dived right back into his lecture, resuming the position he was in when I came in. Severus was softly laughing next to me. I put my head on my desk, resisting the temptation to completely tackle him and make good on my promise to scoop out his eyeballs with my bare hands. He continued to look at me and laugh until I finally gave up and looked over at him with huge eyes.

"Stop!" I whispered. He raised his eyebrows, and then shook his head, the smirk never leaving his face.

"What's your problem?" I asked after class, following him out. I faintly heard Stacie calling my name as we exited the room.

"Oh, so you're not leaving me alone anymore? Pity. I was rather enjoying it."

"I'm sure you were. Anyways, why were you laughing at me?"

"I've just never seen anyone be late to Slughorn's class. That's kind of taking your life in your own hands." He stopped and looked me square in the eyes with those black, burning eyes of his. "Let's go back to you leaving me alone, okay? Sound good to you?"

"Whatever," I said as Stacie dragged me away. Our eyes didn't break their connection until Stacie grabbed my face and turned it towards hers.

"And I thought you were leaving him alone," she said, her words full of anger and worry.

"I was…until he started laughing at me."

"Who gives a shit?" She said, pulling me into a corner. "Look, PM, something's not right with him. I can sense it. I really think you should stay away from him from now on."

"Planning on it."

She smiled. "Good. Glad to hear it."

~*~

"He's looking at you again," Ben said the next morning as we sat down to breakfast. I had not slept well the night before, so I was rather groggy and grumpy.

"I don't give a shit. Give me some coffee."

"All there is is pumpkin juice," Stacie said, passing me the pitcher.

"Fine, whatever," I said, taking the pitcher. I was pouring the drink into my goblet when all of the sudden, some kid bumped my elbow. I ended up spilling it all over myself. Stacie got some of it, too, and stood up in shock. I banged my head against the grand table, and then stood up and walked out. Stacie came with me, squeezing out her robes as she went. As I looked back at Ben, who gave me a sympathy look, I noticed two people sitting next to Severus, laughing and pointing at me. He was smirking.

I was pissed. "Oh my God, I think Severus sent people over to do that to me."

"What?" Stacie was leaving a trail of pumpkin juice to the Ravenclaw dorms. "Did you piss him off again? I thought I said to leave him alone."

"I haven't talked to him since yesterday, and I didn't really say anything then," I said, starting to leave my own trail. "God, I smell like a pumpkin! There's pumpkin pulp in my hair! Gross!" We climbed in our dorm and changed our robes. Stacie twirled her wand and dried both of us off. She was always good at the vanity spells. I was good at the ones that made things do things, like _accio _or _leviosa. _Flitwick had always liked me when I took his class – I was really good at Charms.

"Thanks, Stace."

"Not a problem." She smiled. "Oh, I missed something." She grabbed a piece of pulp out of my hair. "There we go. That's better."

"Can I kill him?"

"No. Don't be crazy. Just ignore him."

I sighed. "All right, fine. But if he does something else, I'll kill him."

~*~

I sat next to Stacie the next Potions class. Severus was sitting behind me. I looked behind me and shot him a glare before turning back around. I could feel his eyes boring into the back of my head – I thought my brains were going to melt and pour out of my ears. The class went smoothly, however, and Slughorn even gave Stacie and I points for our house for our excellent potion. We both had no idea how we got it to be excellent, but were happy with the result nonetheless.

"I want to talk to him," I said as we were leaving class. Stacie shot me a look.

"Why?"

"I want to know why he did what he did yesterday."

"Who cares? It happened. He's creepy."

"I care," I said, stomping off towards him. I was wearing the loud flats I wore the first time I yelled at him.

"Why did you have people spill juice on me?" I said, one volume level below yelling. "That was totally uncalled for."

"I didn't do that," he said, a little taken aback. "Narcissa decided to do that. I had no part."

"Then why were you smirking along with them?"

"I thought it was kind of humorous," he said, trying to quicken his pace to get away from me. He thought my short little legs weren't a match for his huge stride. He was wrong. "Keep in mind, I don't like you."

"Well, I don't like you, either, but you keep popping up everywhere." I stopped in front of him. "Is that on purpose? Are you stalking me or something?"

"No," he said, trying to get around me. I moved every time, blocking his way. He started to growl. "Move."

"No. I want to know the truth."

"You're the one who started this. I don't owe you an explanation. If anyone does, you owe me one. I still don't know why you accosted me."

"Because you said what you did to Lily!" I said, stomping my foot on the ground. The halls had started to clear, but the group of kids that were left looked at my small tantrum. "And I had just found out about it, and I hate it when people do what you did. It makes me crazy. I don't care if it was a year ago. It doesn't matter. What people like you say and do makes me-"

"People like me?" He crossed his arms, obviously furious. "What would you know about people like me?"

"I know the type," I said, glaring at him. "Mean, angry, terrible people who don't care about anyone else but themselves!"

"You don't know anything," he said, turning around and walking off. I ran to catch up with him, my heels clacking on the floor. The hall had cleared out completely – it was just he and I.

"Yes I do!" I grabbed his shoulder and spun him around. "I know a lot about people like you, and I despise them!"

"There you go with the 'people like me' phrase again! You don't know who I am, or who the people like me are!"

It was then that my entire perception of him changed. He raised his robe arm and showed me the inside of his left wrist. It was covered in a dark, snake-like tattoo. I audibly gasped, my eyes growing wide. The intrigue he had on me disappeared. I felt tears start to form as I backed up a few paces, and then took off down the hall, too scared to even think.

**A/N: Haha, when I wrote the last part, I went "OH, SHIT!"**

**Heh.**

**Much more to come, I promise! Love you guys!**


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N: And I return!**

**So, the story's not gonna make sense for a little bit…but it'll get back on track, I promise. It might also go a little fast, but it'll slow down…I promise. Again.**

**Chapter 3  
**

_"Harry!" I said, dropping Lorissa's hand and running over to him. He greeted me with a huge hug. "How'd you know to come here?"_

_"Your dad notified me with an express owl." He grabbed the piece of paper out of his zip-jacket hoodie and handed it to me. It just said it was an emergency, and that he needed to be at the hospital as soon as humanly possible. "I caught a cab here immediately after I got it."_

_I looked at him and smiled. I hadn't seen him in a few months. "I'm so glad you're here." I grabbed him and gave him another hug._

_"Would it be okay for me to kiss you?" He whispered in my ear. I looked over at my dad, who was pacing back and forth, still on the phone._

_"Yeah," I responded. We kissed. It was nice. He hugged me again, and then we walked over towards Lorissa, hand in hand. Lorissa looked from me to Harry, and back again. She looked at our clasped hands, and then understood._

_"Oh, so this is the boyfriend?" She pointed at him. I nodded. She stood up and extended her hand. "Lorissa Carter, Krystel's cousin. Nice to finally meet you." _

_"Harry Potter," he said, grabbing her hand and shaking it. A flicker of pain went through her eyes, but she kept her cool. She knew that he had seen her dad die. And that…well…he was Harry Potter. There was that. I was proud of her for staying strong._

_"Anyways," Harry said, turning to me, eyes sparkling, "why am I here?"_

_"Sit down," I said, pulling him down into the seat next to me, "there's a lot to explain."_

~*~

"Damn," was all I could say as I sat next to the lake later that afternoon. I had been thinking about what I had seen...what Severus had shown me. I knew that I hadn't been seeing things, but I kept hoping I had. It seemed too farfetched to be true.

He was a Death Eater. A young one, at that. He worked for Him. He was evil. I had been messing with someone evil.

"He really _could _have cursed me," I laid back on the grass, arms extended. It was a cold day, and I was freezing, but the grass felt too good to get up. I stared up at the clouds. One of them looked like his nose. "Gah!" I rubbed my eyes, forgetting that I had put eye makeup on.

"Something told me I'd find you out here," Ben said, sitting down next to me. Ben probably asked around. I looked up at him, and he started laughing.

"What?"

"You look like your eyes just got run over by a train," he licked his thumb and tried to smudge my makeup. I batted his hand away repeatedly before grabbing it and tackling him. We wrestled for a little bit before both collapsing in the grass.

"It's freezing out," he said, looking over at me. "Why on Earth are you outside?"

"Needed some time to clear my head."

"Stacie tells me that you're still talking to Severus."

"Not anymore." I rolled over on my side, resting my head on my hand. "He could kill me."

"That's what we've been trying to tell you."

"I know." And I did know. I knew that Ben and Stace were just looking out for me. He was just…intriguing. But no more. I wasn't going to associate with him after what he had revealed to me.

Still…I felt kind of honored, in a morbid way. I mean, he had to put some trust in me to show me his Mark. I could have run up to Dumbledore's office and turned him in, but I didn't. I ran the other way. Why? No idea. But I did it.

There was a flicker of a thought that I had some sort of weird crush on him, but it disappeared as soon as it came into the forefront of my mind. That was preposterous. He was creepy and I wasn't.

…At least, I had never really been told I was creepy. Weird? Yes. Socially awkward? Oh yeah. But creepy? No.

"Okay, I can't take it out here. Let's go inside." Ben stood up and brushed off his pants and robe sleeves. He held out his hand, and I took it, him pulling me up. He didn't let go of my hand. I let him hold it, my cheeks getting slightly pink.

We walked back to the castle hand in hand, neither one of us saying a word.

~*~

Us Carters had a Christmas tradition that started after my aunt Sarah moved to America. My mom and my aunt had always been very close; in fact, after her parents kicked her out for being pregnant with me (and deciding, thankfully, to keep me), Sarah allowed her to stay with her until she got back on her feet. So, every year around Christmas time, one of them would either head to England or America, depending on which year it was.

The tradition continued after both sisters had kids. Grace was the same age as I was, and was attending Ashberry Academy in Indiana. Like I had mentioned before, she was one of the few friends I had growing up. We corresponded with letters throughout the year, always counting down the days until we could visit during the Christmas break.

That year, it was our turn to head to America. The train ride back to England seemed to take forever. I was so excited – seeing Grace was one of the highlights of my year. Stacie, Ben, and I all rode in the same car, until some girl with chestnut brown hair and a big smile came and swept Ben away. Then, it was just Stace and I.

"So, you're headed to America this year, right?"

I nodded.

"Awesome," she said with a bit of a sad tone.

"Aww, Stace, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," she said with a smile, "I'll just miss you is all."

"Oh, I know," I said, going over to her and giving her a hug, "but school will be here before we both know it. Besides, you're going to Ireland! You should be uber excited for that." I paused, a smirk creeping up on my face. "Maybe you'll meet some hot Irish guy."

She waved her hand at me. "Yeah, whatever. Like any Irish guy is going to fall for me."

"You never know," I said, squeezing her really tight. "Anything can happen."

~*~

"AAAAHHH!!!!!" Grace tackled me as I walked up her driveway. It was a gorgeous, 50 degree day in Indiana. The flight had taken about 6 hours, and then the drive from Indianapolis up to Muncie took another hour. Mom and I were exhausted, but it was like we had both taken 4 shots of espresso when we saw our favorite people.

"Annie! I've missed you so much!" Grace grabbed my suitcase and dragged it into the house. "Wow, what's in here? A plane?"

"Oh, just my life," I said with a smile. "I've missed you, too!" I took a deep breath of Indiana air. "I always love coming here."

She gave me a look of 'you're crazy'. "Yeah, well, I guess it's exotic to you. It smells like frat parties and college boys to me. Come on inside," she held the door open for me, which was ridiculous, since she had my suitcase. I held it open for her in return, and we headed up the stairs. I turned around to see my mom and Aunt Sarah still hugging and dancing in the front yard.

"They're ridiculous," I said aloud when we got into Grace's room.

"I know," she said with a laugh. "It's like they haven't seen each other ALL YEAR."

I threw one of her teddy bears at her. She laughed even harder, taking it and divebombing me with it. We proceeded to wrestle on the ground (I don't know if you've realized this, reader, but I'm rather fond of wrestling people) until she called out truce. We separated and laid on the floor, her flaming red hair flowing like a halo around her head, and my bushy hair practically sticking to my own head. "I missed you," I said, looking over at her.

"I missed you, too," she said, flashing me her perfect smile. "Now, you need some sleep. I'll wake you up at, like, 2 in the morning so we can talk."

"What's that weird change in your accent?"

"Oh, it's valley girl. All the rage here right now. You'll probably start to pick it up."

"I rather like my _Bri-ish_ accent, thank you," I said, making my accent sound more Cockney than it ever had been.

"Whatever. Go to sleep." She shut off the light, and I crawled into her humongous bed.

~*~

The next thing I knew, she was shaking me awake. "WAKEY, WAKEY, EGGS AND BAKEY!"

I swatted her away. "MRRRRRRRRRR!!"

She hit me repeatedly with one of the pillows. "Come on, wake up! I want to talk to you! We have to catch up!"

"How about when CIVILIZATION is awake?" I rolled over and put her pillow over my head.

"Fine. Scoot your ass over." She climbed into her bed with me and pulled me into a hug.

"Grr."

"You know you love it," she squeezed me tighter. "I'm going to hold onto you until you get up!"

I sighed. She wasn't going to let me sleep any more. "Fine. Get off of me, and I'll get up."

"Yay!" She scooted off of her bed and started jumping around her room.

"What are you on, anyways?" I rubbed my eyes. "You're way too happy."

"Nothing. High on life, and the fact that my best friend is here." She pulled me out of bed. I stumbled slightly, running a hand through my hair. My hand got stuck. Grace saw it and laughed. "Here, have a hairbrush. Let's go downstairs; I don't want the parentals to go nuts."

"Whatever." I had only been there for a few hours, and I could already hear myself putting the 'r's on the end of words. The American accent always invaded my own rather quickly. By the time I got back to school, I was going to sound like Grace.

We went down to the basement to talk. Grace started in immediately with, "Well, there's this guy…" I listened intently, trying to come up with some sort of guy thing to talk about. We normally did, with me mentioning Ben, and her always mentioning someone else. This year, though, I really didn't have much to say, since Ben and I had mutually agreed not to date. The only person I really could talk about was Severus, and I really didn't want to bring him up. He was kind of evil.

Not kind of…totally.

She mentioned someone named Paul, and then John. I interjected with "Are you dating the Beatles?" She laughed, saying that she didn't know a George or a Richard, otherwise she probably would complete the cycle. After going through Josh, Mike, and Steve, she finally turned it to me. "So, is there still an ongoing soap opera between you and Ben?"

"Nope." She looked shocked. "We agreed to not date, citing incest as the main deterrent." I stuck my tongue out in disgust. "He's like my brother."

"That's not what you said last year," she said, lying back on the sea of pillows we had set up.

I sighed. "I know…but it's what I'm saying this year. He's like my brother. Besides, he jumps from girl to girl rather often. I wouldn't want to be just another name in his book."

Grace nodded. "I understand." She paused. "That was a short convo on your end. Any others?"

I sighed again. Should I go for it? "Well, there was this one really interesting guy…" It slipped out before I could stop it. Guess I was going for it. "But I'm done with that."

"Do tell."

I shifted uneasily. "What if I don't want to?"

"Don't care. Tell. Spill. I want to hear about it."

So, I did. I told her everything. I told her about our meeting in the library, about my freak out, about my poking and prodding…even about the Mark. Once I was done, she sat there in silence, looking at me with this crazy expression.

"What?"

"You are one messed up chick."

I laughed. "I know, I know. He was intriguing. Dark and mysterious. You know," I gestured randomly, "like the Phantom." I shrugged. "I guess that's what I go for now."

"Well…" she thought for a few minutes, leaving me hanging. "maybe you should go for it."

I sat there, speechless. Did she really just say what she thought she said?

"Wh-what?"

"Yeah. Do it. A little adventure never hurt anyone." She paused. "Well, maybe some people, but I doubt it would hurt you. If anything, be his friend. It sounds like his life sucks. Maybe he just needs a friend."

I just stared at her. "Are you kidding me?"

She looked shocked. "No! I'm not! I'm dead serious." She leaned in closer. "You know, Franklin and Eleanor Roosevelt didn't like each other at first."

"Really?"

Grace shrugged. "I don't know. It's possible. Plus, great fiction has been written about people who don't like each other at first. Take all the Jane Austen books." Grace put her hands on the sides of her face. "Seriously. I just want to scream whenever I read them, since you know they're going to fall in love eventually. It makes my head hurt."

I waved her off. "Whatever. You're crazy. I'm not going to do anything."

"Annie, it's so obvious you like him. Or something…what did you say? He 'intrigues' you?"

I felt myself blush a little. "I don't like him. He's not a good person."

"Maybe he's a good person in a situation where he has to pretend to be awful."

That got to me. He was a Slytherin, after all – there were certain expectations that went along with being a member of that house. Maybe he was just acting.

The Mark was real, though. That wasn't an act.

"If he's just acting," I started, treading on shallow water, "then why did he join the Death Eaters?"

"Oh yeah, I forgot about that…"

"I told you that like…10 minutes ago."

She smiled. "You know me."

I rolled my eyes. "Seriously, though. I could give Severus the credit of acting if it weren't for that little fact." I sighed. "I don't want anything to do with that."

She looked at me for a second, and then shook her head. "What?" I asked.

"You totally like him."

"Shut up! I do not!"

She threw one of the couch pillows at me. "Yes, you do. I know that gleam in your eyes. You used to get it with Ben. Now it's with this Severus character." She started to giggle.

"What now?"

"His name is hilarious."

"It's just different."

"YOU LIKE HIM SO MUCH!"

I dive-bombed her, attacking her with the couch pillows.

~*~

As our usual vacation went when we were in America, we drove down to Indianapolis and went to the Circle Center mall – only, this year, Grace drove. She had gotten her licence during the summer, and she had told everyone that the first person she was going to have in her car (besides her mom) was her cousin – aka me. I felt proud.

"WAKE ME UP BEFORE YOU GO-GO/DON'T LEAVE ME HANGING ON LIKE A YO-YO!" We sang at the top of our lungs while driving on the highway. Grace had a beautiful voice. Me, on the other hand…well…let's just say I didn't sing very often.

"Did you hear there's rumors of George Michael being gay?" She said, turning the radio down as we entered into Indy.

I gasped, even though it was so incredibly obvious. "No way!"

She nodded. "Yeah. Crazy, right? I mean…he's dated so many women. It can't be true."

I laughed. "What?"

"You're so oblivious sometimes," I stroked her hair. "That's why I love you."

She stuck her tongue out at me, almost rear-ending the car in front of us. "Oops. My bad."

"Please don't kill us. I'd like to actually make it to Circle Center this year."

"We will. Don't worry your pretty little head," she stroked my hair in return. I rolled my eyes.

"Oh shit, this is my jam!" She turned up the radio full blast as we belted out the brand new Genesis song, "Land of Confusion."

"I MUST HAVE DREAMED A THOUSAND DREAMS/BEEN HAUNTED BY A MILLION SCREAMS/BUT I CAN HEAR THE MARCHING FEET/THEY'RE MOVING INTO THE STREET…"

~*~

"I can't carry all of these freaking bags!" Grace grabbed all of her shopping bags and immediately dropped them in the driveway. "Mom is seriously going to kill me."

"Your mom is going to kill you? I dropped $70 at Nordstrom's." I grabbed my beautiful new red peasant top out of my only bag. "Do you know how much that is in pounds?"

"Like…50 dollars. Settle down. It's not 300 bucks, like the damage I did," Grace, admittedly, went a little nuts. She bought three pairs of heels at Nordstrom's, a huge candle, a fleece blanket 'for when she got cold in her room', and a couple of tapes to take back to her friends for their after-Christmas gift exchange. "You think Aunt Michelle is going to kill you…ha! They're going to go after me, flags raised, like a full-out assault."

I went over and grabbed a few bags. "You'll be safe until the credit card bill comes. Until then, I'll pretend I spent more than I actually did." I made a sign of a cross on her forehead. "After that, may God protect your soul."

She laughed. "Thanks, Annie." We grabbed some bags and hi-tailed it up to her room before either of our mothers could see them. Stacking them in the corner, I immediately changed into my new top and checked myself out in her full-length mirror. Red had never really been my color, but it worked in this top. I started making outfits in my head.

"Moccasins, my ripped-at-the-knees jeans, a scarf headband, and my long peace sign chain," I said, not taking my eyes off of my reflection.

"Perfect," Grace said with a smile. She walked up behind me, a full two inches taller than before. She was wearing her new yellow pumps. "We've got amazing genes, don't we?"

"We do." I leaned back into her, and she wrapped her arms around me. "We're lucky."

She smiled. "Yes, we are. We can make anything work. Who knew yellow would work on my paleness? And you, in that red. Astounding."

"I know, right?"

She sighed, looking over at her calendar. "You have to leave in a few days."

I pouted in the mirror. "I know."

"And then it's another year."

"Yeah, but, next year, I'm asking Ben to come home with me."

"I'll finally get to meet him?" She stressed 'finally' as much as she could.

"Yep. Who knows if his parents will allow it, though. From what he's said, he comes from a very strict, traditional Japanese family." I laughed. "If only they knew how often he was sent to the office…"

"Well," she sat down on her bed. I was in the process of seeing where the end of the shirt met the beginning of my butt. "I hope he does. I would love to meet the boy who stole my girl's heart."

"He never stole it. Besides, we're not going to date. I already told you that."

"Yeah, and he'll keep to that after he sees you in that shirt."

I gave her a 'seriously-stop-it' look. "What? It's the truth. No guy – not even that one guy that you like – could resist you in that shirt."

"I'll make you a bet. I'll give you 20 pounds if one guy looks at me in that way."

She stood up and walked over to me. "And I'll give you whatever the transfer rate is at that point if no one does."

We shook hands. "Deal."

~*~

The second Ben rushed into our train compartment, I lost the bet.

"Hey girls – wow," His jaw dropped when he saw me. "You look good, PM. New shirt?"

I nodded. "Yeah, got it in America."

"Amerrrrrrrrrrrrica," he said, cracking up. "I always forget how much your accent changes when you go over there."

"Leave me alone," I crossed my legs, my knee poking up out of my ripped-up jeans. "It's not my fault"

"It'll go back to normal in no time," Stacie said, walking over to my side to give Ben space to put his huge suitcase in the overhead compartment. "It always does. Anyways, I'm sure I picked up a bit of an Irish accent."

I nodded. "You did, a little bit. But it was totally worth it, though, right?"

She flashed a big grin, blushing a little bit. "Yeah, it was definitely worth it."

"What happened? Did you…did you meet someone?"

Her grin got impossibly bigger. She nodded. "Yeah! I did!"

Ben left the overhead door wide open and sat down next to her in five seconds, grabbing her hand. "Do tell."

"His name is Martin, he's 17, brown hair, green eyes, absolutely wonderful…my mother will never approve, though," she said with a sigh.

"Why?"

"He's a Muggle who knows nothing about…well…all of this." Stacie spread her arms out. "And I didn't have the heart to tell him about it. Or for him to meet my parents, because they would have said something about it." She smiled weakly. "Sometimes, it's best to let them just imagine it exists."

I shook my head. "Martin, huh?"

She nodded. "Yep. Martin Finnigan. God, PM, you have no idea how incredibly CUTE he is!" She grabbed something out of her bag and showed it to me. It was one of those picture strips from the photo booths where you take four pictures at a time.

He was a looker, that's for sure.

"Very nice," I passed it to Ben, who nodded his head in approval. He turned it over to reveal the scrawled writing on the back.

"Ooo, looks like someone got a number!"

"Give me that!" Stacie started chasing Ben around the corridor. She eventually tackled him, stealing the paper from his hands while he screamed, "Truce! Truce!"

"Teaches you to steal stuff from me," Stacie said, brushing off her tweed skirt. "Don't mess with me, Koromashi. I am not afraid to KILL you."

Ben mocked her speech, and then, catching the eye of a leggy blonde 1st year walking by the corridor, dismissed himself with a smirk.

Stacie and I looked at each other, each rolling our eyes.

"That is a really nice shirt on you."

"Thanks."

~*~

_"That's impossible," Harry said, eyes huge. "He's dead. I…I watched him die."_

_"I know," I grabbed Harry's hand and squeezed it. Lorissa looked like she was about to burst into tears. "But he's not. Somehow, some way, he's alive. And he's in one of the hospital rooms. Annemarie's back there with him."_

_"Well, have you heard anything?"_

_I shook my head. "No, I haven't. No one has come out here. Dad's over there, calling someone. A Stacie, I think." I sighed. "We've got nothing."_

_Lorissa went over to Dad, wrapping her arms around his middle. He stopped pacing and hugged her with his free arm. "Stacie? It's Ben. Listen, Annemarie's alive. I know that's a lot to take, but that's not all." He paused. "So is Severus. I need you to come to Holy Cross hospital in London as soon as you get this." He paused again. "She needs you." He hung up the phone, pulling Lorissa into a full-bodied hug._

_I put my head on Harry's shoulder. "I've missed you."_

_"I've missed you, too."_

_"Any decision on where you're living?"_

_He nudged me off of his shoulder and looked me in the eyes. A little part of me melted. Those stupid green eyes. His mouth crinkled into a smile. "America."_

_My eyes got wide with excitement. "Really?"_

_He nodded. "I need a change of scenery. And, since I can Apparate, it's not a problem to visit Ron and Hermione." He stuck his tongue out. "Which I will do sparingly. They're rather mushy right now."_

_"Unlike us, right?" I snuggled into him._

_"Right." He kissed my forehead. "So…would you be willing to stay with me?"_

_I smiled into his shoulder. "I thought you would never ask."_

_Just then, a hysterical woman of Dad's age charged in through the hospital doors. Harry and I both looked up at her. It was Mrs. Finnigan._

_"Koromashi! You have explaining to do right now!"_

**A/N: Long chapter, I am aware. Hope you all don't mind. Also, I'm not so sure what I meant about the story not making sense for a while…so…disregard that.**

**Hope you all are enjoying it so far, and that it's not too confusing.**


	5. Chapter 4

**A/N: Hello all!!**

**Please enjoy.**

**Chapter 4  
**

As soon as we got back to Hogwarts, I went on a search. A quest, if you will. Grace's voice rang in the back of my head as I scoured the halls for Severus. I knew had to have been there somewhere - I just wasn't sure where.

I went up and down the halls. Not there. I went in the Great Hall, where everyone was enjoying their first meal back. Not there. I grabbed a roll off of Stacie's plate and looked over the Slytherin table. No sign of him. Without answering the persistent "Where are you going?" s from both her and Ben, I darted out of the hall and looked up and down the halls again.

"Where the hell did he go?" He had to have been on the train. Either that, or he stayed in the castle for the holiday. He couldn't have dropped out…could he? The thought raced through my mind until another one pushed it out.

The Astronomy Tower.

"Duh!" I said really loud, causing the group old ladies in the portrait above me to giggle and whisper at me. I waved them off, laughing along with them at my outburst. "Sorry about that, ladies."

I quickly sprinted towards the Tower, sliding all over the floor in my non-traction moccasins, much like Tom Cruise in _Risky Business_. I nearly collapsed when I finally got into the telescope room – not only from being incredibly out of breath, but from the fact that he was actually there, and that he didn't notice me standing in the doorway.

_"If anything, be his friend."_

I looked at him, trying to push the fact that he was a Death Eater out of my mind (yeah, not easy). There he was. All alone. While all of the other students were out seeing their friends and talking about the events of their breaks, Severus was up here, by himself, reading a book.

And…as I noticed after the ringing in my ears went away, listening to the Beatles. "Tomorrow Never Knows", to be exact.

"Nice song choice," I said after I gained my ability to speak back.

Severus looked up at me. His expression didn't change. "How on _Earth_ did you find me?"

"Intuition, I suppose."

He said nothing for about thirty seconds while I stood there, taking deep breaths, trying to keep my asthma from action up. "What's with you?" He finally asked, raising an eyebrow at me.

"Oh, I just ran up here from the Ravenclaw dorms, that's all."

"What's with your accent?"

"What?"

"Your accent. It's awful."

I laughed, which made me wheeze a bit. "I spent the holiday in America. It changes every time I go over there. It'll go back to normal in a few days." He turned his attention back to his book, obviously not interested in my life story. I sighed, willed my legs to move, and sat down next to him. He glanced over at me, and then pulled the book closer to his face, blocking me out.

"What are you reading?"

"Why do you insist on bothering me?" There was almost a whine to his tone. It made me smile.

"It's fun, especially since you hate it so much. Now, what are you reading?"

"Nothing you would be interested in."

I checked out the book cover. "_The Scarlet Letter_. Man, you have good taste! Have you read it before? How far are you?"

"Go away."

"That book has one of the greatest plot twists I have ever read. My aunt gave me that book for Christmas a few years ago, and I read it in an hour…hey, where are you going?" Severus has slammed his book shut, and was now stuffing his vinyl copy of Revolver back in its sleeve.

"Wherever you are not."

"Oh, come on, Severus," I stood up and blocked the doorway. His eyes were burning holes through me. "I'm honestly trying to talk to you. What's wrong with that?"

"I don't want to associate with you," he said with a snarl. "Now move."

"No."

He rolled his eyes. "_Please_ move."

"Not until you promise to give me the time of day."

"Whatever happened to you leaving me alone?"

"That went out the window a long time ago." I sighed. "Look, I know I was crappy in the beginning," he tried to side swipe me, but I blocked him. "But I don't want it to be that way. You're interesting. I want to know you."

"The feeling isn't mutual. Move."

I decided to go out on a limb. "Fine, but that's a lie, and you know it."

For the first time, I saw Severus' face soften. It was only for a split second, but it was there. He pushed past me and took off down the stairs, mumbling to himself. I stood there, with one arm up against the wall, wishing I could figure out how to read minds.

~*~

Stacie stared at me as I recounted what Grace had told me, and my brief meeting with Severus in the tower. She looked confused, angry, and sad, all at the same time.

"You put too much emphasis on eyes and facial expressions," she said after I told her about his face softening. "He was probably just shocked by what you had said. You're taking this too far."

"I know you're concerned, but honestly, I'll be all right. I know how to handle it."

"No, Annemarie, you don't." She slammed her book down. "You want to be his friend? You want to put your life on the line like that? Fine. Whatever. But don't expect me to stand behind you on that." She stormed up the stairs to our room and slammed the door.

"Stacie!" I went up after her, banging on the door. "Come on, Stacie. We live together. It's not like you can avoid me."

Samantha opened the door a crack. "Are you guys fighting? I'm trying to study, and it will really put a damper on my concentration if you are."

"I guess. Can you get her to come out here?"

She sighed loudly, and then grabbed Stacie by the arm and threw her out of the room, closing and locking the door behind her. We stood there for about 5 minutes, looking at each other. Stacie's face started off being red, but it gradually returned to its normal pink-tan color. I just stared at her, trying to figure out what to say. Eventually, though, she flung her arms around me and squeezed me tight.

"I just worry about you. You know that." She ended the hug, wiping a tear off of her cheek. "But it's your life. I can't stop you. I'll try…but, ultimately, I can't." She smiled weakly. "Just don't forget about me."

"Of course not. I couldn't do that, even if I tried."

~*~

_"I know I do, but-hey," Dad rushed over to the emergency room doors. Harry and I stood up and looked; Annemarie had just wandered out of them, looking completely haggard. She was holding her arms close to herself, and she looked on the verge of tears. He and I exchanged glances, fearing the worst. "How is he?"_

_"Hanging in there, I guess," she responded, sniffing. "He's really sick. They said he's going to be here for quite some time." She sighed. "They kicked me out because I was getting hysterical. I just…I can't see him like that." Dad wrapped his arms around her and held her close to him, patting her hair. Mrs. Finnegan was frozen to her spot, eyes wide. I'm sure the sight of the best friend she thought had died was a complete shock to her system. _

_"Sorry," Annemarie said, wiping her nose, "I got stuff on your shirt….Stacie?"_

_They bolted to each other and embraced, sobbing._

~*~

I started to become habitually late to Potions class. Slughorn had started to ignore me if I was only five minutes late, but anything after that; he liked to take points from the house. The Ravenclaws started to really hate me, but I didn't care. I wanted to sit by Severus, and I got to do that when I was late, because I had no other seat choice.

There were mornings that I really did have an excuse, though. Like this morning; I was trying to do a spell that would straighten out my hair, but it ended up lighting it on fire. I had to cut out the burnt parts. Knowing that I was over five minutes late, I left my hair uneven, not even bothering to run to the infirmary and see if Madame Pomfrey could fix it.

"Did you burn yourself?" Severus asked as I slid in next to him. Slughorn deducted 10 points from Ravenclaw. Stacie glared at me.

"I burnt my hair. See?" I held up the part that was still slightly smoldering. "I'm no good at spells."

"Evidently not."

"I'm not good at many things regarding magic," I started, trying to move the smoke out of my eyes. "I'm amazed that I'm not classified as a Squib."

"You're good in Astronomy, though, aren't you?"

"Yeah, but that's stars and stuff – hey! You just asked me a question, and were actually interested in what I had to say! We're having a conversation."

He was chopping up some kind of leaf (I'm telling you, I'm no good at this stuff), and my comment made him stop mid-chop. He looked over at me with a deadpan expression. "We were having a conversation. You just messed it up."

"That's what I get for being socially awkward – I mess up our first real conversation."

"Here," he said, sliding some sort of grass over to me, "chop this up." He started scribbling in his book, crossing a few things out as he went. I slowly chopped up the weird grass, watching him work. He was intense.

"You're really good at Potions, aren't you?"

"I suppose so. I know how to make them work, anyways."

"Could you teach me?"

He stopped scribbling. "Would you want me to?"

"Maybe."

He sighed. "I'm sure I…could…are you not finished with that yet?" He grabbed the knife out of my hand and started furiously chopping up the grass. He didn't notice that my cheeks had gotten a little pink from the sudden hand-to-hand contact.

"Are you serious about that, or are you just being mean?"

"Me? Mean? Never," his words dripped with sarcasm. I could see him smirking through his curtain of hair. I desperately wanted to tuck it behind his ear so I could see his face, but I knew that wouldn't go over well.

Besides, he had a knife in his hand. Scary.

"So…which one is it?"

He sighed again, irritated at my inability to follow his train of thought. "I can help you, I suppose. You need it, that's for sure," he then sniffed the air, "that and a haircut."

I laughed. Stacie turned around and looked at me, eyes wide. I shrugged, mouthing 'he's funny!' at her. She shook her head and turned back towards Slughorn. "I'll probably just have Stacie cut it later. Do you know Stacie Avery?"

"Don't believe so," I could hear his interest waning. I liked actually having a conversation with him, "but I'm guessing that's her down there?"

I smiled and nodded. "Yep! That's her. She's my best friend in the whole world."

"Good for you."

"Who's your best friend?"

"Don't have one."

Not surprised. "Aww, that's a shame. Everyone should have one." I felt an annoying streak come up. "Tell you what. I'll be your best friend."

"We'll see about that." There was that smirk again.

"I swear, Severus," I said, creeping around his curtain of hair to look him square in the eyes. "You have all of four expressions."

"And what would those be?"

"Deadpan, smirking, anger, and annoyance."

He nodded. "Sounds about right."

"Do you ever smile?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because, Annemarie," he shut his book and started stirring the potion, "there's not much in my life to smile about." He turned his back to me, signaling that he was done with the conversation.

"I could change that."

I saw no change in his posture. I turned back to the front of the room, choking back tears. I knew it wasn't going to be easy, but I never realized how hard it would actually be.

Slughorn came around and judged all of our potions ('ours', of course, was the best, since Severus was, apparently, the supreme Potions Master of the Universe), and, seeing that everyone did pretty well, dismissed class early. I tried to catch Severus before he left, but he took off like The Flash, and I wasn't able to find him.

"So, he's funny now, hmm?" Stacie asked as she cut the burnt ends of my hair off and evened it out.

"In a dry and unintentional way, yes." I fidgeted with my hands. I never knew what to do with them when I was getting my haircut – which, mind you, wasn't really that often. Hairdressers hated dealing with my hair since it was so big, thick, and poufy. "He's also really sad. Did you know, today, he told me he has no reason to smile?"

"Doesn't surprise me there," snip, snip, snip, "he is a Death Eater, after all."

"Yeah, you're right, but still…even that weird blonde kid that he hangs around all the time smiles. The most I've ever seen Severus smile is when he smirks." I sighed. "And he does that a lot. But, seriously, Stacie, we actually had some sort of a conversation today. I think I'm getting through to him."

Snip. "You can go on thinking that, but I'm pretty sure that he still thinks you're a pest."

"Maybe so, but he's at least talking to me now. All of my pestering has gotten me somewhere. He even said he could help me with potions."

Snip.

"He said that?"

I nodded, turning around. Her jaw was on the floor. "He did."

She turned my head back around and continued lightly trimming towards the top layer of my hair. "Maybe you're farther along than I thought you were. How's that?" She grabbed her mirror and held it out for me to survey my hair.

"Ooo, hot!" Since I burnt the bottom parts of my hair and a large stripe up the middle, Stacie had to shape it up dramatically. There was probably a good two to three inches of hair on the ground. I ran my fingers through it and came across no knots, which was something that never happened. "This is to die for!"

"Not a problem," she said, putting her hands on my shoulders. "Who knows, maybe it will get him to notice you a little differently."

I smiled. "Let's hope. I'd rather not have to resort to showing him my boobs."

She smacked the back of my head gently. "You're crazy, you know that?"

"I'm chasing after a Death Eater. I know I'm crazy."

~*~

Stacie and I went down to dinner after she casually decided to put some extra makeup on me. I would have never admitted it to her directly, but I kind of felt like a whore after she was done. I let her go on ahead, and washed some of the blush and foundation off. I left the eye makeup because it was actually good – she got the smoky eye down that I had always tried (but failed) to get.

"Oooo la la!" Ben said when he saw me. I flashed him a big smile as he bolted from the Gryffindor table over to me. He started playing with my hair, ruffling it all over the place. I knew that that would make it really poufy, but I didn't care, because, at that very moment, a certain someone was looking at me with an expression I had never seen on his face.

Awe.

I beamed inside. "You like it?" I asked Ben as he grabbed my arm and sat down next to me.

"Like it? You look ravishing!" He leaned in close, his breath on my ear. "You have never been cuter, PM."

I blushed. "Quit that."

"I'm serious! So, I was over at the Gryffindor table-"

"Your actual house table," Stacie interrupted, winking at me. I giggled.

"Yeah, well, whatever. Doesn't matter. Anyways, I was over there, and Sirius and James both asked me who the new girl was."

I blushed even deeper. "_They _actually noticed me?"

He nodded. "Yeah." He turned around, and then turned back with a grin. "Looks like someone else is as well."

"Stop it!" I hit him on the arm, not resisting the chance to steal a glance in the Slytherin table's direction. Severus had evidently looked elsewhere once Ben noticed he was looking at me. "Anyways, the credit goes to Stacie. She did it."

"She burnt her hair this morning," Stacie said, pointing a forkful of mashed potatoes in Ben's direction. "She tried that straightening spell that I use."

He looked at me with mock awe. "You burnt your hair?"

I grabbed a fist full of his hair and pulled. "Shut up, Koromashi. I'll kill you."

He laughed. "I'm sure that was pleasant. Well, everyone," he grabbed a roll off of my plate, "I've got a bunch of Transfiguration homework to do, so I bid you all adieu." Ben looked at Stacie, who discreetly nodded.

"What are you –" But, before I could stop him, he was over at the Slytherin table, whispering something in Severus' ear. I watched as his eyes narrowed, and he turned red. I immediately ran over to Ben and dragged him into a corner.

"What did you just do?"

"Nothing." Ben smiled his sickeningly sweet smile at me.

"Don't you lie to me, Ben. What did you do?"

"I just told him that we knew."

I stopped. "Knew what?"

He laughed. "Are you serious? You're that oblivious."

"What are you talking about?"

"I told him that we knew that he was totally into you."

I froze, eyes wide. Nope. Not true.

"You little shit!" I tackled him to the ground. We wrestled for a bit, with me pinning him up against the wall at the end. "You seriously suck, you know that?"

He smiled triumphantly. "Yeah, I know."

"WHOO, GET IT, BEN!" We started to hear cheers coming from the exit of the Great Hall. They were coming from – whom else – Sirius Black and James Potter. "YEAH!"

"Shut up, guys," Ben said as he gently pushed me off of him. He brushed off his robes, waved once with a smile, and darted off with them, laughing.

"You look really pretty, by the way," Lily Evans said with a wink. She helped me up, smiling the whole time. She was the pretty one, not me. "Annemarie, right?"

I nodded.

"Ben talks about you all the time, but, for whatever reason, he hasn't introduced us…anyways, I'm Lily," we quickly shook hands, "and I'm glad we finally got to meet."

"Me too." I said with a huge smile. Ben talked to his other friends about me? Sweet.

"Lily! Come on!" James yelled down the hall.

"In a minute!" She hollered down the hall, and then turned back to me. "Come sit at the Gryffindor table sometime. We'd love to have you." She smiled and chased after James, lightly pushing him when she met up with him. Ben waved again, and the group was gone.

'Wow,' I thought, stalking off to find Stacie and ask her if she knew what Ben did before it happened, 'someone other than the two…well, three…people that I talk to actually talked to me. Cool.'

~*~

I walked back into my room to find Stacie dancing around to Rick Astley's new song, "Never Gonna Give You Up". She was covered in sweat by the time I took the needle off of the spinning 45.

"Hey! I was listening to that!" She went to put it back on, but I blocked her hand.

"I need to talk to you."

"No you don't. Put Rick back on!"

"Why did Ben do what he did?"

"Oh, that," she said, pulling off her leg warmers and putting them on her bed, "well, we thought that since you were being incredibly crazy about the whole situation, we'd join in and be crazy, too."

"I could KILL the both of you!"

"Maybe it's your way in."

I flopped down on my bed. "No, probably not. You guys probably just screwed it all up." I pulled on my hair. "God! You guys kill me!" I stood up and walked towards the door. "I'm going for a walk."

"Where are you going?"

"Somewhere. Anywhere. Just not around you or Ben." I stormed out of the dorm, not paying attention to where I was going.

Where did I find myself?

The Astronomy Tower, of course.

And who else was up there?

Why, none other than Severus Snape.

"Great," I said once I saw his silhouette by one of the telescopes, "just great. Don't worry; I'm not going to bother you. I'm not as shitty as my friends. Sorry about today." I turned around and walked down the stairs. I got about half way down when I felt his hand on my shoulder.

"Annemarie, wait."

**A/N: Read and review! I like reviews. ^_^**


	6. Chapter 5

**A/N: Yay story…This makes me happy. This one makes me happy.**

**Chapter 5  
**

"Annemarie, wait." I froze. I could hear a sliver of anger in his voice. I turned to face him. We were only a few inches away from each other. I could feel his breath on my face. "What is it that you want from me, really?"

"What do I…I want to be your friend." Lie.

"Is that all?"

I nodded, gulping. "Yes." Lie.

He stared at me for a few seconds, motionless. I could faintly hear "Something" playing up in the tower. "This is my favorite song."

He raised an eyebrow. "What?"

I half-smiled, still slightly freaked out. "The one that's playing. 'Something'. 'Abbey Road'. Nice choice."

"Thanks…" He turned, walked up a few steps, and then turned back. "That day, in the library…that was you, wasn't it?"

I gulped again and nodded. "Yeah, that was me." I flipped my hair. "I'm the Beatles girl."

He stared at me. "Right." And, with that, he went back up the steps and disappeared into the tower, leaving me in the stairwell, wondering what the hell just happened, and if he had caught my lie.

"I am going to KILL them," I said as I wandered back to my dorm. "I am seriously going to kill them."

~*~

The next few class periods were spent with Severus and me in silence. He wouldn't even look at me, let alone talk to me. That was all right, though; I was getting used to the silence. I was refusing to speak to either Stacie or Ben after what they did. They kept coming up to me, apologizing and trying to get me to talk to them, but I didn't give in. I was still incredibly angry with the both of them, and I didn't feel they deserved my attention.

"I noticed you haven't been talking to anyone," Severus piped up, out of the blue.

"You've taken notice to what I'm doing?"

"With that haircut, you're rather hard to miss," I started to smile, but he kept talking. "Don't take that as a compliment – it makes the top of your head look huge."

I flattened my hair. I knew he was being facetious…right? He had to have been. I saw his look the day Stacie did it. He liked it, and he knew it. "Yeah, well, I'm mad at everyone right now."

"For what?"

"For-" I almost said, 'For messing things up with you,' but I resisted. "For going out of their way to embarrass both you and me. Neither of us needed that. It's infuriating to me," I sighed, "and they need to know that."

He grated a root. "It doesn't matter to me what they did."

"But you looked angry."

"I'm always angry."

"Why is that?"

He stopped grating and turned his entire body towards me. "Why do you insist on trying to get inside my head?"

"I've told you – you're interesting."

He sighed, returning to the root. "Fine. I'm angry because everyone is angry with me."

"Not everyone is angry with you, Severus."

"The people who matter are."

"I'm not."

He said nothing.

"I'm not angry with you. Doesn't that amount to anything?"

Nothing.

I sighed, crossing my arms and leaning back in my seat. "Okay, I get it. I don't matter. That's cool, I understand."

"I didn't say that," he whispered, pouring the grated root into the cauldron.

"Oh, so I matter?"

"I didn't say that, either."

"God, you're ridiculous!" I put my head in my hands.

"See? You're angry with me."

"I'm not angry – I'm frustrated."

"Isn't that the same thing?"

"No," I said, putting a hand on his shoulder, "it's not." He shrugged me off. "You know, maybe if you let people in, you wouldn't be so lonely. Or grumpy."

"I'm sure I'd still be grumpy."

I giggled a bit. "Your sense of humor is great."

He smirked. "Glad someone appreciates it." He stirred the potion.

"So, what were we even supposed to make today?" I said, leaning over to look in the potion.

"Amortentia," he said nonchalantly.

"And what is that?"

His smirk grew into – wait – was that a smile? No. Not possible. "A love potion."

~*~

_A few days passed. Annemarie, Stacie, and Lorissa all stayed at the hospital while the rest of us went back to the house. Aunt Michelle ha just decided to head out (mom said it was because she really didn't like Snape, but she wanted to be there for her daughter and granddaughter) when we got there. Mom and grandma were out somewhere, and dad decided to leave._

_Leaving Harry and I alone in the house._

_Heh._

_"So, what do you want to do?"_

_"Don't ask me that," Harry said with a smile, "I'm a guy, after all."_

_I punched him in the arm. "Geez, horn dog much?"_

_He shrugged. "What can I say?" He came over and put his arms around me. "I'm alone, in a house, with a beautiful woman that I love. Of course the thought is going to cross my mind."_

_"We could go driving." I hugged him, and then dragged him towards the door. "I'll show you the wonders of Indiana."_

_"Or we could do that."_

~*~

I stared at Severus in awe. "Did you just tell me to _julienne_ this root?" I pointed to the nasty looking root on the cutting board. We were alone in the dungeons, with him trying to teach me how to make the 'love potion' we made in class. I didn't want to take that as a sign, but a little voice in the back of my head sincerely wanted me to just jump him, right then and there.

I didn't, though. I just listened.

"Yeah, that's what I said."

"Well, how do you do that? I'm not Julia Child, you know."

He cocked his head in confusion. "Who?"

"You know, Julia Child." Nothing. "The chef?" Nothing. I then cleared my throat and did my best Julia Child impression. "You know…_Oooh, a little cooking sherry for the pot and a little cooking sherry for me…I'm Jooooolia Chiiiiild._"

He shook his head and started cutting the root. "That's how you julienne something."

"Was my impression that bad, or do you still have no idea who I'm talking about?"

"No idea."

I shook my head in disbelief. "Sad. She's really entertaining." I sat down on the desk in front of the cutting board. "Do we really have to do this?"

"What, make the potion? You're the one who wanted me to help you."

"I know, but I'm just not in the mood."

"It's your grade." He continued to work on the potion while I watched him. At one point he looked up, his face deadpan. "What?"

"You're just so…intense."

"Umm…thank you?"

I smiled. "You're welcome." We sat in silence for a while, the only sound of him chopping stuff up. I had never realized how much chopping went into making a potion until I started sitting with Severus. He really knew how to make a potion – Stacie and I would always just throw stuff in the cauldron and hope it turned out. "So, when you're done, do you want to take a walk or something?"

"With you?"

"Why not? It's a lovely day."

"It's the middle of March."

"So? It's nice out. The snow's melted, and it's not too cold. It's almost spring." I put on my puppy dog eyes. "Please?"

He looked up for a few seconds and sighed. "Fine."

"Yes!" I danced around the room. "The puppy dog eyes never fail."

"I'm not going because of the puppy dog eyes. I'm going because you'd keep annoying me if I didn't."

I paused. "True," I resumed dancing, "but you'd eventually give in to the puppy dog eyes. Everyone does."

"Whatever." He threw everything in the cauldron and stirred it a bit

"So did it turn out?"

"Of course it did. I made it." He smirked with pride.

"You're an asshole, you know that?"

"I've been called that." He stood up and started walking towards the door.

"Where are you going?"

He paused and turned around. "We're going for a walk, aren't we?"

I blushed a little. "Yeah. Are we leaving right now?"

He just stood there, like I was psychotic. I got up and followed him out the door. We walked out to the lake in silence.

"So, are you ever going to be in the mood to work on potions?" He said as we both sat down under a large tree. We were on a hill overlooking the lake.

I laughed. "Probably not. I just wanted an excuse to hang out with you."

"Oh." We were silent for a few seconds, until he spoke up. "You know, you're becoming less and less annoying."

I straightened up. "Really?"

He nodded. "I'd even be inclined to say that you've grown on me slightly."

"Like…as a friend? Or as some sort of weird growth?"

"Do I really have to say it?"

I poked his arm. "Say it. I'm your friend."

He mumbled something.

"Not good enough! Say it loud!"

"Annemarie, I consider you my friend."

"Victory!" I did a few laps around the tree in excitement. "I did it!"

"Yes, you succeeded. Now sit down. People are looking." He was covering his eyes with his hand when I sat back down.

"Aww, Sev's embarrassed."

He looked at me with a new expression – surprise. "Sev?"

"Yeah…we're friends now, so I thought I could give you a nickname." I paused. "Is that okay? You can call me something, if you want. Grace calls me 'Annie', and Stacie and Ben call me 'PM' –"

"Stop talking. It's fine. I'm just not used to someone actually…well…caring enough to give me a nickname."

"Well, get used to it, because I care a lot."

He looked at me skeptically. I couldn't believe how many expressions he had once he was actually comfortable with someone. "You care?"

"I'm your friend, aren't I?" I smiled.

"I suppose. It's just strange. I haven't really had a friend since…well…I'd rather not talk about that."

"Ooo, are we about to have a deep conversation?" I lie down in the grass and put my head in my hands.

"No, we're not." He sighed. "Maybe later, but not now."

"Ok." I sat back up and leaned against the tree. After about thirty seconds of silence (and me watching Severus play with the grass), I decided to ask some random questions. "So, how are your classes?"

"Are you making small talk?"

"No," I lied. "I'm curious."

"They're all right, I guess. How are yours?"

"My goodness, I tell you…mine are awful," I sighed in frustration. "I'm so bad at magic that it makes everything really hard. Except Astronomy – I'm actually good at that." I shrugged. "It runs in the family."

"Being good at Potions runs in my family, too. My mother was always really good." He smirked. "I'm better, though."

"Ha. I'm better than my mom in Astronomy, too." I looked at him, wondering if I should prod into his family life. I decided not to. "So, they're good?"

He nodded. "Yes, they're good."

An idea popped into my head. "You know what we should do?"

"What?"

"We should write notes to each other."

"Uhh…notes?"

I nodded. "Yeah. We should. I kind of sense that you're not much of a talker-" he nodded in agreement, "And I'm totally socially awkward…so…we should do that. Maybe it would make our friendly conversations easier."

He looked at me for a second, wearing his deadpan expression. Then, his face came alive, and he shrugged. "All right. That sounds feasible." He paused. "You can tell I'm not too good at this friend thing, can't you?"

I nodded. "I'm not either, so don't worry. Tell you what," I said as we both stood up to head back to the castle. "I'll write you the first letter. Kind of set the stage. Then, we can go from there. Okay?"

"Okay." We chit-chatted the rest of the way about our classes (it was mostly me doing the talking…big surprise, right?). We said our goodbyes before heading off to our separate dorms.

"Oh, Annemarie?"

"Yeah, Sev?"

He smiled. Genuinely smiled. I felt my heart melt. "I really like your haircut."

"Oh my God," I said under my breath as I smiled back, hoping that he wouldn't see my cheeks getting red. "Thanks. I…uh…like yours, too."

He shook his head and turned around, heading back to the Slytherin dorms. I leaned up against the wall for a minute, trying to catch my breath. My head was swimming.

'Severus complimented me…"

~*~

I chewed on the end of my quill – a nervous habit of mine. I was sitting in Transfiguration, trying to figure out what to write to Severus. All I had written was  
"I'm in Transfiguration, and I am so bored."

'Like he cares about that,' I thought, picking the feathers I had out of my mouth. Suddenly, the burly guy sitting next to me slid a piece of paper underneath my arm.

"Uhh…where did this come from?" I whispered, looking up at McGonagall to make sure she wasn't looking at me. He pointed to his right. I looked around him and saw Stacie, who was looking at McGonagall and me repeatedly. She pointed to the letter, and then resumed her 'I'm-paying-attention-but-not-really" face.

I looked down at the letter. All it said, in big letters, was "I'M SORRY." I smiled. I missed her. I wrote back to her, saying that it was okay, because Severus and I were friends now. I gave it to the burly guy, who passed it along without saying a thing.

Stacie grabbed me after class and pulled me into an empty classroom. "You are?"

I nodded, smiling. "Yeah. He said I had grown on him to the point of us being friends." I grabbed the incomplete letter out of my book and showed it to her. "We're going to write letters to each other to help with the talking aspect." I put it back in my book. "We're both too socially awkward to hold really good conversations."

She nodded. "I see. Well…that's good, I guess. Just be careful, all right?"

I smiled. "Always."

~*~

Dear Severus,

I started writing this in Transfiguration (and all I had was 'I'm in Transfiguration and I'm so bored'), and then I finished it in Astronomy. I know you were expecting it in Potions today, but I totally didn't have anything to say until later.

I think we should hang out in the Astronomy Tower. I'm sure your Slytherin friends would think it were really strange if you started hanging out with a Ravenclaw, and my friends are kind of iffy on the whole situation. Anyways, I think it would be a nice place to hang out.

Plus, I like it up there. I know you do, too. And, since you're a Prefect, we can go up there whenever we want.

I hope things are going well. I'll see you tomorrow.

- Annemarie

**A/N: First letter! You can read Mixed Emotions to find out more about the letters, because I probably won't put all of them in. Just the important ones. **

**And yeah, Severus is going to be kind of OOC. Seriously, though – don't you think he would be if he actually had a friend? He was with Lily, he will be with Annemarie. **

**Read and review!**


	7. Chapter 6

**A/N: God, college is so boring right now! I have nothing to do…and my creative juices are failing me. Oh well. I think this story is coming along swimmingly. My Charlie and the Chocolate Factory one…well…that's a different story. V_V**

**Anyways, you're not here to listen to me whine – you're here for the story! So enjoy!**

**By the way, thanks to everyone who has reviewed! I really appreciate it – it's what keeps me writing!**

**Chapter 6  
**

Annemarie-

Take as long as you like writing these. I'm sure it will take me some time to actually figure out something to say. Maybe that will get easier with time. Here's hoping, anyways.

My classes are all right, I suppose. I'm trying to make it appear that I'm paying attention in Transfiguration right now (funny how we're both writing our letters in McGonagall's class – do you think it means something?), and that I'm vehemently taking notes. I'm not so sure if it is working, though, as McGonagall keeps looking at me. Maybe she thinks I'm being an exceptional student. Not sure.

Anyways, I think the Astronomy Tower is a great idea. Like I said, I have access to it at all times, so, since you're with me, you won't get into trouble.

I want to apologize for when I was cruel towards you. I'm rather standoffish (as if you wouldn't be able to tell), and very skeptical of people when I first meet them. Not to mention the second way we met (which I'd like to have a conversation with you about at some point, if you wouldn't mind…). But, now that it's different, I just wanted to formally say sorry.

See you in a few hours,

-S

~*~

'Oh shit', I thought as I read Severus' letter. 'He wants to talk about the second time we met…when I went up and practically assaulted him.'

"What should I do?" I said after explaining the situation to Stacie. I was lying on my bed, and she was folding her clothes. Stacie had a weird way of packing most of her things a few months before we left for school.

"You know how I feel on the situation. You should stick to your guns. Besides," she said, folding one of her t-shirts. "We're almost out of school. You'll have a whole summer apart."

"But what if he gets pissed? We'll have to see each other for a whole month and a half after that."

"I'm sure you guys could work it out. You seem to be getting along _swimmingly_," she said the last word with a sickeningly sweet tone. I wanted to smack her across the face.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I've seen you guys in the hallways. He totally likes you."

"No, he doesn't. We're just friends."

"If there's anything I've learned from hanging around Ben Koromashi, it's how to tell when a guy is into a girl. And trust me, he's into you."

I played with that thought for a moment. What if it was true? What would I do? Would I go for it? I'd want to, that's for sure…but there was always the lingering fact of the danger that I could be in because of him…

"Whatever. I'll believe it when he tells me."

"You'll probably be waiting for a while. He doesn't seem to be the relationship type."

"I'm sure he would be if he had the opportunity."

"Well, then, why don't you go for it?"

I put my pillow over my face, and then threw it at her. "You know I suck at that stuff. I've never even had a boyfriend. I don't know how it all works."

"Talk to Ben, he knows."

"I know he knows. He's a whore."

She laughed. "Yeah, but we love him."

I sat up. "You know, I haven't talked to him since…well…yeah."

"Ooo. That might make it difficult."

"Yeah. I'll talk to him at dinner."

"Sounds like a plan."

~*~

"Relationship advice, huh?" Ben said, raising an eyebrow at me. "You and old Severus going at it?"

"God, no! Come on, Ben."

He laughed. "I'm just kidding. First off, though, I'm glad you're talking to me again."

"I'm glad, too."

"No hard feelings?"

"None."

"Good. Now, personally, I think you should take this incredibly slow. Like…snail slow. Sloth slow." He looked at me for emphasis. "You understand?"

I nodded. "Yeah. Slow."

"It seems to me like he's not the relationship type-"

"That's what Stacie said."

"Figures. She would take the words out of my mouth." He ran a hand through his hair. "Anyways, you just entered the 'friend' stage. Take it really slow, and see where it goes." He paused, a smile tugging at his lips. "But, I'd say you have a good shot. He's totally into you."

"Everyone's saying that. I just don't see it."

"It's true. I've seen the way he looks at you from across the Great Hall. He likes you."

"Maybe it's just because I'm his friend," I said, looking straight at him. "I mean, I look at you when you're over at the Gryffindor table."

"That's different. You look at me like a friend. He looks like…well…he looks like how a guy looks at a girl."

I hit him on the side of the arm. "Eew! That's awful."

"It's not a bad thing! It's just the way it is. Evolution deems us to be…well…animals."

"Well, it's still awful, and I don't like you talking about him like that."

Ben shrugged. "Whatever. It's true, though."

I stuck my tongue out at him. "So, take it slow, then?"

He nodded. "Extremely slow." He pointed down the hall. "Look, there he is! Go say hi!" He pushed me out into the hallway, causing me to let out a loud "Aaah!" Severus looked over in my direction, and, when he figured out it was me, just shook his head with a smile.

"Whoa. Did I just see Severus Snape smile?"

I nodded, stars in my eyes. "Yep. He smiles at me."

"He totally likes you."

~*~

We exchanged mundane notes for the next month and a half, both of us so busy that we barely were able to see each other, let alone speak. We met in the Astronomy Tower a few times; him armed with his record player and a Beatles album. With all of the tests and everything that we had to study for, all we really talked about was how crazy our classes were, and how big and terrible our tests were going to be. He kept bringing up our second meeting, but I kept blowing it off, really not wanting to talk about it. Eventually, though, I gave in, agreeing to meet with him the Saturday before we were to leave for summer holiday. Severus and I met in the Astronomy Tower late that night, him bringing up his record player and his copy of Abbey Road, per my request. I always found that it was easier to talk about heavy things with music in the background.

"All right, so, I know this is an awkward conversation," Severus started once the needle was on the record and "Come Together" started playing, "but I've been curious for a while now as to what brought that conversation on."

I sighed. "Well…we had that conversation in the library, and I was curious as to who you were. I asked Ben, since he knows all, and he told me what happened with…umm…Lily Evans."

"Oh." He looked sad.

"Yeah. And, um, I don't take that kind of stuff lightly, so I went a little crazy." I paused, feeling incredibly awkward. "I apologize for the way I acted, but not for why I did it…why did you say it, anyways?" My voice went into a whisper that was barely audible over Paul's bass.

"It just kind of slipped out…" He ran a hand through his hair. "I've tried to talk to her about it, but she refuses to speak to me. I didn't mean it at all. I mean, honestly, I'm a-" he stopped, eyes wide. My eyes got wide, too.

"You're not…"

"Muggle-born?" We said at the same time. "No," he replied, "I'm not." He sighed. "I guess I can tell you…but you have to swear not to say a thing to a soul. Nothing. You promise?"

"You're a half-blood, aren't you?"

He hung his head. "Yes, I am."

I stood up in rage. "And you allowed that word to come out of your MOUTH?!"

"Annemarie, please," Severus put his hands up in defense. "I'm as angry at myself for it as you are. I don't condone my behavior whatsoever. I-" he stopped, hanging his head again, "I actually really hate myself for it."

"Well, that's no excuse for being a hypocrite." I put my hands in my hair, lightly pulling. I couldn't believe it. "How could you do such a thing?"

"I don't know," he whispered, obviously ashamed. But, I was in a rage, and that didn't matter.

"Consider this over," I said, storming out of the tower. I heard him call my name down the stairs, but I didn't stop. Tears blurred my eyes, and I ran back to my room and cried myself to sleep.

~*~

We sat in silence the last few days. On that Wednesday, he passed me a note in Potions, but I just pocketed it, not really concerned with what it had to say. I sat there, stone-jawed, in awe of how completely and totally I had fallen for the hypocrite next to me. I was upset with myself, without a doubt. Every day after Potions, I would go back to the common room and cry next to the fire. Stacie tried to get out of me what happened, but I didn't want to tell her, because she'd just tell me her and Ben were right about him, and that wasn't what I wanted to hear at all.

"Please read the letter," he whispered to me as I got up to turn in my Potions final. I looked at him, feeling the tears prick up in my eyes. He looked miserable. I shook my head and walked down to Slughorn's desk, slamming my paper down and exiting the class swiftly.

I didn't see him board the train. I almost wished I had, though, just to have seen him before summer started. But, at the time, I didn't care. The letter itched in my pocket as I sat there, watching Stacie sleep through the night. Eventually fed up with my own curiosity, I relented, grabbing the letter and whispering "Lumos".

"Dearest Annemarie," I whispered to myself.

"I am writing this to you in desperation. I know that what I have done is wrong. I know that. I live with it every day. Lily Evans was my friend, and I lost that because of what I did. Don't you see? I hate myself for what I did.

"Yes, I am a half-blood, and yes, that does make me a hypocrite. It makes me a bigger hypocrite than you know. If anyone found out…well, that's not important to this letter. What is important is that I want to sit down with you and explain what happened.

"I would like to meet before we leave. If you don't read this by then, then I would like to meet during the summer. I believe you live outside of London somewhere – it wouldn't matter where; I'll go anywhere to fix this. I would do anything to change what happened.

"Please, Annemarie. I'm begging you, even if you don't want to continue our friendship, to at least listen to what I have to say. I had forgotten how nice it was to have a friend.

"I'll do anything.

"S."

I leaned back, a tear escaping from my eye. I knew that he was on the train, but I hated the thought of going down to the Slytherin end and trying to find him. They were all so…

"Creepy?" I said out loud, causing Stacie to move and mutter something about ponies. I laughed to myself, thinking about that word, and words that went along with it. Creepy. Strange. Crazy. Freak. Everything Severus was to the outsider, and everything he really wasn't to the insider.

I put the letter back in my pocket and closed my eyes, letting the other tear fall down my cheek before wiping it away. I let myself fall asleep, dreaming of Severus' black eyes the whole time.

"We're here," Stacie said, shaking me awake. "Hey, are you okay?"

I jumped a little bit, and then looked down. The collar of my shirt had wet spots on it. I had been crying in my sleep. "Yeah, I'm all right. Just a bad dream."

"Okay…well, come on, we've got to get out of here before they take us back to Hogwarts."

We got our stuff off of the train and said our goodbyes. Ben found us through the crowd and wished us a great summer. Stacie told me that she was off to Ireland again – her mom wanted to go. "It gives me an excuse to see Martin again," she said, beaming. "I'm so excited."

"Well, how was the semester?" Mom asked after we loaded everything into the back of our car and headed out towards Camberwell, outside of London.

"Busy," was all I said. We drove the rest of the way in almost silence, with mom singing along to her favorite 60s songs.

When we got home, I called Stacie, leaving a message on her voicemail. "Hey, it's me. I know you're not home yet, but I need to talk to you about Severus. Please call me back before you leave for Ireland. Love you."

~*~

Stacie never did call me back, so it was a surprise to me when mom came in my room to tell me that someone was at the door to see me a month later.

"Jesus, Stacie, took you long enough to-hi," I stopped in shock. Severus was leaning up against the doorway, looking down at the step. He was dressed in a black, gray, and white sweater. He looked really hot – both literally and figuratively.

"Severus, it's 80 degrees outside. Why are you wearing a sweater?" I myself was dressed in a pair of jean shorts and an ordinary pink t-shirt. My hair was up in a ponytail, and I wasn't wearing any shoes.

"I didn't really have anything nicer," he said, looking up at me. "I figured that if I were to meet your parents, that I should look halfway decent. Anyways," he tucked some of his hair behind one ear, "would we be able to talk?"

"Come in for a second," I said, still flabbergasted that he was at my doorway. He nodded and walked in, standing in the doorway for a second. I gestured for him to go in the living room. He obeyed, rubbing the back of his neck with his hand. He was obviously nervous. "How did you find out where I live?"

"Ben," he said, his cheeks turning slightly red, "I asked him before we left school."

'Ben. He would.'

"So, you came all the way out here to see me?" I shook my head in disbelief. "Where do you live again?"

"Kensington," he said with a sigh. Before I could protest, he put a hand up to stop me. "Yes, it was a rather long and rather complicated trip, but I'm here, and I really hope you'll give me the time of day now, since I came all the way out here."

"Well, I kind of have to…" I looked him up and down. "How long are you going to be here?"

"As long as it takes to fix this."

I sighed. "Okay, Sev. Let's talk." I sat up straight, trying to portray my lack of interest in actually talking. "Tell me what you want to say."

"I want to say I'm sorry. I messed up, not only our relationship, but also Lily and me's relationship as well. She and I used to be very close, but once I said what I did, it was over. I was so skeptical of letting you in, but I did, and now I've messed this one up, too." He put his head in his hands. "I'm not asking you to forgive me for what I did. All I want is for us to still be friends."

I put my hand on his shoulder. "I'm glad you don't want me to forgive you."

"There'd be no way anyone could."

I nodded. "Very true." I proceeded to rub his back. His sweater was very soft. "I guess it's something you – and I – will have to live with."

He looked up at me. "What are you saying?"

I sighed again. "I'm saying, Sev, that I can't believe you traveled all this way just to apologize to me. I'm saying that I probably won't ever forgive you for the incident, but that I can forgive you for being so stupid about it." He sat up straight, and I crossed my arms. "I'm saying that we're still friends."

He stared at me for a few moments, and then he broke into a smile. "Are you sure about this?"

I nodded. "Of course. I wouldn't lie about something like that."

He sighed a sigh of relief. "Well, that's wonderful."

"Wanna go for a walk?"

"Kind of, yeah."

"All right. Mom! I'm going out!"

~*~

"So how long did it take for you to get here?" I asked in between eating my ice cream sundae. We decided to head to the ice cream parlor by my house (and to stay inside, since it was air conditioned), and each indulged in some yumminess.

"About an hour and a half. The buses were really behind. Normally, it would have only taken about a half hour." He took a bite of his sundae. It was still strange to see him outside of school, in a sort of Muggle setting. "It was getting really frustrating, especially since I just wanted to be here."

"Aww, you wanted to see me? How sweet."

"Well, it's not like I screwed everything up again."

I touched his arm. "Don't be so hard on yourself. Things happen."

He scoffed. "Not like what I've done."

"Sev, come on…things happen. You can't keep beating yourself up over it. Yes, it was a terrible thing, and yes, it happened, but you just need to pick yourself up and move on. Besides," I smiled, " you have me now. I'm here for you."

"Lily and I had been friends since we were little kids, you know," he stirred his half-melted ice cream around a little bit. "She was my first friend. One of my only friends. I…" he paused, and then shook his head. "Never mind."

"What?"

"Nothing. Anyways," he lowered his voice, "I think you should know that I joined them because of that incident."

I knew exactly whom he was talking about. My eyes widened. "You did."

"Yes," he lowered his gaze. "Without her, I felt as though I had nothing to live for." He laughed sarcastically. "I guess you never know what life will bring you."

I took that to mean he had something now. I really, really hoped he was cryptically talking about me. "Do you regret it?"

"Yes," he said breathlessly. "I do." He shook his head. "I don't belong there, you know? I'm not one of them. I don't care about the things they care about. But, once you join…" he looked out the window.

I nodded my head. "You can't get out."

"The only way out is death."

We sat in silence for a while. I tried to come up with something to say.

"So…how about them Bears?"

He laughed a little. "You are a strange one, Annemarie."

"Oh, trust me, I know."

"So," he leaned in, eyeing me suspiciously, "you know my deep, dark secrets. It's only fair for you to share yours."

"But what if I don't have any?" I did, of course have one – I was practically obsessed with him, no matter what ridiculous thing he did. But that wasn't something I was ready to share. "What do I do?"

"Oh, come on. You have to have something."

"Well, I don't know who my dad is."

He stopped stirring. "You don't?"

"No. I was conceived at Woodstock."

He raised an eyebrow. "The concert?"

I nodded. "Yeah. My mom went with a group of her friends. After she found out she was pregnant, my grandparents kicked her out of the house." I sighed. "I've never met them…and I have no idea who my dad is."

"Wow." He ate a spoonful of his sundae. I watched him intently. "I guess that could be a dark secret."

I shrugged. "That's all I've got, Sev."

Lie.

Blatant lie.

Huge lie.

But what was I supposed to do? Come out with it? 'Severus Snape, I love you with every single fiber of my being?'

Yeah, like that would go over well.

We ate our ice cream and then left, wandering back to my house. "You know," he started after we had fallen in step with each other, "I don't think your mom likes me."

"Psh," I said, waving him off, "She comes off that way sometimes."

"No, really. I don't think she likes me."

"She'll warm up to you."

"You think?" He looked over at me skeptically.

"Well, yeah," I said, smiling warmly at him. "She likes my friends. All two…well…now three of them." I noticed he was smiling as well. "You know, Sev, you really should smile more during school."

"Like I said," we both paused as we looked across the street, making sure no cars were coming, "I've never really had anything to smile about. The only people who used to get me to smile were my mom and Lily. And now…it's you."

"Aww, you're sweet."

"I mean it."

I blushed. "Where did this nice streak come from?"

"I guess it comes with the territory." He climbed the stairs up to my door with ease, his long legs moving gracefully. HOT. He then looked at his watch. "And this is where I leave you."

"Aww, really?" I leaned up against the railing, looking up at him from the steps. "Do you have to go?"

"I need to catch the next bus. My mother didn't know I was going anywhere – I'm sure she's curious as to where I ran off to…" He ran a hand through his hair, smirking. "If only she knew I went to see a girl."

I laughed. "Oh Sev, you crack me up." I looked at him for a moment, and he did the same. We stood there for what seemed like eternity until he broke the silence.

"Well, um, I need to go."

"Right, right." I held my arms open to him. "Hug?"

He looked at me incredulously. "Really, Annemarie? Really?"

I shook my head and patted him on the back. "You'll hug me eventually."

"Right."

"Hey, you didn't think we were going to be friends?"

He thought about that for a moment, and then nodded, looking defeated. "Yeah, I guess you're right." He brightened back up. "I'll write to you, all right?"

I nodded. "Please do."

"Okay. Well…bye," he backed up down the stairs and wandered off towards the bus station. I watched him go until he disappeared from my line of sight.

"I don't like him," my mom said as soon as I ventured back in the house. "I don't like him at all."

"Oh mom, don't write him off like that."

She stood in the foyer, arms crossed. I looked a lot like my mom – the same bushy hair, the same hazel eyes, the same body build. I was taller than her, though, and I had strawberry-blonde hair as opposed to her red. I figured that came from my dad, but, of course, I had no way of knowing.

Thanks, mom.

"What is his name, again?"

"Severus. Severus Snape."

"Nope, don't like it," she walked into the living room, sitting down and turning the TV on. "I don't think you should hang around him."

"Well," I said, climbing the stairs to my room, "I don't care, because he needs a friend, and that's what I'm going to be to him."

"You just watch," she yelled up the stairs, flipping through the channels, "you're going to regret not listening to me one day."

"Whatever!"

~*~

Dearest Annemarie –

I've contemplated coming to see you again, but as it is almost September, I figured it would be pointless to do so. Not that I wouldn't be willing to see you, but it doesn't really make sense to do so.

I've missed our conversations in the Astronomy Tower. I know they were few and far between, but it always seemed like we were the most comfortable with each other when were there. Except for the last time…but let's not count that.

Basically, I've just missed conversing with you. I've never felt more at ease with someone in my life. I told my mom about you – and yes, she was proud that I was out with a girl (don't worry – she knew my intentions were good), and she said she would like to meet you at some point.

There is so much more that I would like to write in this letter, but I have to go immediately. **He** is calling me…

-S

~*~

The new school year was always an interesting transition point for me. I had gotten so used to sleeping in and doing whatever I wanted that when it came time for school, I almost dreaded it.

Not this year.

Seventh year was my final year at Hogwarts and, as much as I was not looking forward to being thrown out into the real world, I was ready to get out. I had been saving my money up so that I could travel around the world – or at least to France, which was the one place that I had always wanted to go, but never had the chance to. I was excited for what the year had in store.

Also, I would get to see Severus again, but that's beside the point.

Stacie greeted me with an epic tackle in the train. Ben joined in, forming a small little dog pile on the floor of our compartment. I yelled at them to get off of me, eventually having to start a massive tickle fight to get them off.

Ben Koromashi is an incredibly ticklish individual. I don't know if I've mentioned that.

"So, did you get some action over break?" Ben asked Stacie, who was beaming.

"No action…but he did kiss me."

I let out a loud, high-pitched girl squeal. We jumped up and hugged, me twirling her around in excitement. Ben put his hands over his ears, protecting his eardrums from our screams.

"You guys are such girls."

"Uhh…last time I checked," I said with a smirk. He waved me off. "So, he kissed you?"

Stacie nodded. "Yeah. I wrote to him, and he was so excited to see me. We spent almost the entire vacation together. We took this the day I was leaving" she showed me the picture she had in one of her folders – the two of them smiling, one of the large Irish castles behind them, "and he kissed me before we got in the cab to the airport." She let out a girl squeal of her own. "It was amazing."

"Are you two official then?"

Stacie nodded. "Yeah, we are. I gave him my home address to write to. My mom is going to owl all of his letters to Hogwarts for me."

Ben stood up right as the train lurched to move. He fell backwards onto the floor, but got up again. "You still haven't told him you're a witch?"

"Well…" Stacie shifted uncomfortably. "No."

"That's going to be an interesting conversation." Ben put his fingers in the form of a telephone and made his voice rather high-pitched. "Martin, dear, I have something to tell you…I'm a witch." His eyes grew wide as his hands switched ears. "WHAAAT?"

"I know, it'll be different. But, hopefully, he won't care." She sighed. "We're perfect for each other."

"We'll see about that," Ben said, eyeing the doorway for any fresh meat. I smacked him on the shoulder.

"Can't you wait until we get to the castle?"

"Aw, come on Annemarie," he said, winking, "we're seventh years now. Someone's got to tell the girls how beautiful they are."

"Yeah, but we're almost at the age of that being pedophilia."

"Oh." He looked down. He obviously didn't think of that. "Well, shit. I'm getting old."

"We all are."

I caught a glimpse of Severus as he walked past our open compartment door. He looked in just as he was passing and smiled at me. I smiled back.

"Ooo!" Ben said, poking me on the arm. I swatted his finger away. "Looks like someone's made some headway with the friendship thing."

"Don't encourage her, Ben," Stacie said, looking out the compartment door. "He's still creepy, even if he is smiling now."

"Get used to it, guys," I said, stretching out my arms and putting them behind my head. "Because he's not going anywhere."

**A/N: LONG CHAPTER!**

**Hope you enjoyed it. ^_^ Read and review. **


	8. Chapter 7

**A/N: Can't you tell I've been really bored the past few days? Chapter after chapter has been churned out…but whatever. It makes you guys happy, right? That's all that matters.**

**This chapter is going to seem rather choppy, but I'm putting some of their letters in between action sequences, so I apologize ahead of time.**

**On with the chapter!**

**Chapter 7**

Dearest Annemarie –

It's great to see you every day again. I have to say, I never thought that I would have a friend again…but you seem to have come along at just the right time. I will say that I am glad that we're friends, but don't let that get around. I don't want to destroy my image.

I hope you're laughing at that. I am.

Anyways, I hope that everything is going well with you, and that your classes are treating you well this year. Fortunate for you, we have Potions together again. I know we'll be busy this year, so we'll have to make time outside of class. I don't know if I told you, but I'm Head Boy of the Slytherin house, so I have free reign of the castle at all times…meaning the Astronomy Tower again. Let's meet there again this year, like we used to before everything happened.

Always,

S

~*~

Severus –

Classes are crazy this year. Who knew that I would have to know how to turn a tomato into a cat by now? I sure didn't. And, I may have to take you up on your potions help offer, if that still stands. I hope it does, because I really need it. Anyways, hope all of your classes are going well. Congratulations on the Head Boy position! That's super spiffy. And yeah, the Astronomy Tower sounds great. Let's meet tonight at 11 – class up there is done by then, isn't it?

Your best friend (and you know it's true),

Annemarie

~*~

"Aww, no Beatles tonight?" I said as I sat down in our normal spot. He hadn't brought his record player with him, and that made me very sad.

"No, not tonight…I didn't feel like lugging it all the way up here." He sat down next to me, gingerly rubbing his arm.

"Hey, is everything all right?"

"Yeah," he said, looking away from me and down at his arm. "Everything's fine. It just hurts."

For a split second, I wondered why his arm would hurt, and then I realized it; that was the arm with the Mark. Upon further inspection in the moonlight, I noticed that Severus had serious bags under his eyes, and that there was a slight cut on his cheek.

"Sev, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," he smiled sadly. I could tell he was lying.

"It's Him, isn't it?"

He nodded his head, now just holding his arm. "He's calling me."

"Well, then, go." I put my hand on his shoulder. "You know you have to."

"'.to," he said through clenched teeth.

I stood up, brushed off my robes, grabbed his other arm, and pulled him up. "You need to go." He looked at me, and my heart melted. He looked heart broken. "Sev, go."

"I'm so sorry, Annemarie. Please forgive me."

~*~

Sev –

I hope everything went all right last night. Astronomy Tower again at 11 tonight. BRING THE FREAKING RECORD PLAYER.

- Annemarie

~*~

Severus showed up with the record player this time, armed with his copy of _Yellow Submarine_. Yellow Sub had never been one of my favorite albums, but it did have a few fun songs.

Like 'Yellow Submarine'.

"WE ALL LIVE IN A YELLOW SUBMARINE, A YELLOW SUBMARINE, A YELLOW SUBMARIE!" I shouted at the top of my lungs over the side of the Astronomy Tower. It was one of the songs that I didn't care if people heard me attempt to sing, because everyone sang it awfully. I had always wanted to sing it karaoke, completely plastered. I had one more year for that, though, so screaming it across the Hogwarts lake seemed like a reasonable option.

"Jesus, Annemarie," Severus said, tugging on my arm to pull me back down. "The merpeople are probably scratching their eyes out from the pain."

"Aww, come on, Sev," I said, grabbing the arm he was tugging me with and trying to pull him up. "You know it's all in fun."

"Maybe so, but everyone's ears are bleeding because of it."

"Hey!" I hit him playfully on the arm. He laughed – really laughed. It was a beautiful thing. "You should laugh more."

"I will when I'm around you."

"Sounds like a plan." I sat back down as the song faded into 'Only A Northern Song'. "Your laugh is beautiful."

He muttered something. "What?"

"Nothing."

"What was that?"

"Nothing."

"No. You said something."

"Annemarie…" he said with a growl. I hadn't heard him do that since we officially became friends. "Drop it."

"Okay," I put my hands up and scooted a little bit away. "I'm sorry."

"No, I'm sorry," he ran a hand through his hair. "It's my fault. I've been very stressed lately."

"I'm sure." I scooted back over to him. We were practically touching. "Did everything go…umm…all right last night?"

"Initiations are never fun," Severus said with a sigh. "Everyone is involved. It gets pretty…intense."

I then noticed the cut he had up above his left eye. "Is that how you got that?" I went to touch it, but he swatted my hand away.

"Yeah. A branch hit me."

"Ow. Do I even want to know how it hit you?"

He shook his head. "It would be better if you didn't."

"All right."

'Only a Northern Song' drifted into 'All Together Now', and then into 'Hey Bulldog' before either of us said or did anything else. We just sat there, silent, gazing into the darkness of the tower.

"I'm sorry you had to see me last night," he said finally, putting a hand over his arm as if it would make the Mark disappear.

"I wanted to see you." I sighed. "I just can't believe that you would try to not go."

"I'm a rebellious teenager," he said with a smile. "What can I say?"

I shook my head, laughing to myself. "You're terrible."

"I know."

I jumped up at the end of the song and started howling and barking along with the song, shouting "Hey bulldog!". Severus, once again, started tugging my arm down. This time, I fell backwards, right onto his lap. I started laughing, not only from the hilarity of the situation, but the sheer awkwardness of it all. We stared at each other for a minute, and then I quickly stood back up, brushing my robes off. I cleared my throat awkwardly.

"On that note, I need to study. Good night, Severus."

"Me too. Good night." He took the needle of his record player and put the record in its sleeve. We walked back to our dorms in silence, exchanging awkward glances the whole way.

~*~

_"So, where is it we're going, exactly?" Harry said over my singing along with Madonna's 'Ray Of Light'. We were cruising along Interstate 69, headed down to Indianapolis._

_"Circle Center," I said matter-of-factly, turning the stereo down a smidge. "It's a great area of Indianapolis that has lots of shops and restaurants. It's a lot of fun, and we're only an hour and a half away." I paused. "I could have taken you to Fort Wayne, too…I know where I'm going there."_

_"You don't know where you're going?!"_

_"I know the general direction." I said with a smile._

_"Krystel Koromashi, what am I going to do with you?"_

_"Anything you want."_

_"Rawr." He looked out the window for a few seconds. "It's rather flat here, isn't it?"_

_I nodded. "Yep. Flat and full of corn fields."_

_"This seems like it would be a very boring drive to make."_

_"That's why we have music!" I turned the stereo back up as the DJ introduced 'Play That Funky Music' by Wild Cherry. "Heck yes!"_

_He shook his head, laughing. "You really crack me up."_

_"That's why you love me!"_

_"I do love you," he grabbed my arm, bringing my hand to his lips. I looked over at him and smiled. His eyes were bright green and twinkling. I wanted to get lost in them, but, alas, I was driving. Sad day._

_"I'm glad, because I love you, too, and it would really suck if you didn't."_

_"That's for sure." He said, pronouncing the 'r' in 'sure' obnoxiously. You know, like an American. "Oh no. It's happening."_

_"What?"_

_"My accent is fading."_

_"Ha!" I said, turning onto 465, the loop that would take us around Indianapolis. In truth, I did know the exit I needed – I just wasn't sure where to go from there. "Hey, can you get my cell phone out of my purse? I may need to call my mom at some point."_

_"Are we lost?"_

_"No, just kind of unsure. That's all."_

_He grabbed it and put it in my hand. I put it in my cup holder as I turned the stereo down so I could concentrate. "Thanks, honey."_

_"Anything for you."_

_~*~_

Severus –

Our awkwardness on the way back last night was kind of funny. You have to admit it.

See you in Potions,

Annemarie

~*~

I slid into the desk next to Severus, smiling the whole time. Yet another day of him being a beast at Potions, and me observing his graceful movements. Potions class was my favorite time of day – not only because I got to watch him, but also because I got to be with him and talk to him.

Yeah, I was gone. Totally gone. I knew I was in love at that point. There wasn't a real reason for it…it was just him. He made me want to love him. He made me want to be with him. But, all I could really ask for was his friendship. I didn't want to push anything on him, since he was so sensitive about our friendship. I had already achieved that, and I didn't want that to disappear.

Plus, he was still a Death Eater. I was able to get past that most of the time, but it was still always in the back of my mind. Every time I looked at him, a flash of the night I saw him in pain because of the Mark would go in front of my eyes. I shuddered every time it happened, but always passed it off as cold chills.

"Are you feeling all right?" Severus asked when he noticed me shivering.

"Yeah, just chills, as usual."

"You should go to Pomfrey and get checked out," he said as he chopped up some sort of root. "You've been shivering a lot lately."

"It's what you do to me," I thought and said at the same time. I hoped I said it soft enough that he didn't hear me, but, alas, that wasn't the case.

"You're funny," he said, throwing the root in the pot, and making some notes in his book.

"What are the notes for?"

"Future reference," he said as he broke something open some seeds and chucked them in the cauldron. "I always write things down when I figure out something that works better than what the directions tell you to do."

I rested my chin on my hand and watched him work. He looked over at me, back to the cutting board, and then back to me. "What?"

"Just watching you work."

"You're acting really strange today." He brushed off his hands and put one up to my forehead. I instantly felt my cheeks get red. "You're a little warm. You really should get checked out. Go see Pomfrey after class."

"I'm fine, Sev, I promise."

"Fine. I'll walk you down there."

~*~

"It appears you're in great health, miss Carter," Madame Pomfrey said as she took the thermometer out of my mouth.

"Told you, Sev," I said triumphantly. If only he knew why I was acting the way I was.

"You're just strange then," Severus said, crossing his arms and looking out the window. I could see the hint of a smile on his lips.

"You know it!"

**A/N: A real chapter will be coming up soon, I promise. Just bare with me – I've got a big English assignment to do, as well as another story to update, and NaNoWriMo. Heh. **


	9. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

Severus and I hung out nearly every night in the Astronomy tower. I was very careful not to wake up Stacie and Samantha when I got back at two in the morning, but, after a few months, and my eyes starting to get bloodshot and droopy, they took notice.

"Honey, I never see you anymore," Stacie said one morning at breakfast. I noticed Severus was looking at me, and I waved at him. He smiled and meekly waved back. "What's going on? You look exhausted. Is everything all right?"

"Yeah, everything's fine. I've just been up late the past few weeks."

"I've noticed," she said, eyeing me suspiciously. "You try and sneak in, but Samantha and I both hear you. What the hell are you doing all the time?"

"Seeing Severus."

"Jesus, are you guys dating yet?"

"No! Nowhere's close." I waved at him again, as he was looking at me again. He waved back, but looked down at his plate, obviously not expecting me to have caught him looking at me. I laughed a little to myself. Stacie turned around for a few seconds, and then turned back. "Don't look at me like that. Nothing is happening."

"I'm telling you, he likes you."

"Are we talking about Severus? Seems like the common topic over here," Ben said as he slid in. His hair was a mess. A girl walked by him a few seconds later, giggling. We all knew what had happened.

"Yeah. Apparently, they've been 'spending time together'," Stacie said, using air quotes. "And she swears they're not dating."

"I'll believe you, PM…but you two should be by now. Seriously. It's almost Christmas. Speaking of Christmas," he leaned in closer to me, "aren't you staying in England this year?"

I noticed Severus' eyes narrow as Ben leaned in close to me. I wondered what that meant. "Yeah, I'm staying this year. Oh yeah, I wanted to talk to you guys about that!" I put my fork down and motioned for them to come closer. "You guys want to come home with me?"

"Would I ever!" Ben said, jumping up in excitement. "I need something to do over Christmas break."

"I'd have to write to mom and ask her, but I'm sure it would be all right."

"All right, awesome!" I took a bite of scrambled eggs.

"You should ask Severus."

It was all I could do to keep from spitting my eggs back out. "Wh-what?"

"Yeah, you should," Stacie pointed at me with a fork full of eggs. "If you two are going to be dating, we need to know this kid a little more."

"But you guys don't like him."

"So? We still need to know him. Right, Ben?"

"Right," he said, slightly distracted. Lily Evans was waving him back over to the Gryffindor table. "Hey, sorry guys, but I have to go. I'll see you guys later." He walked back over to the table, talked to Lily for a few minutes, and then wandered back.

"Lily wants to talk to you, Annemarie," he said with a confused look. I swallowed my eggs.

"What about?"

"No idea. She didn't say. She just asked if I could let you know."

~*~

'Ask him…ask him…ask him…'

I watched Severus work on whatever potion it was we were supposed to be making as if in a trance. I tried to psych myself up to ask him what his plans were for Christmas, but every time I tried to say something, I squeaked. I didn't know why I was so nervous – I just was.

Finally, I took a deep breath and just let it all out. "WHATAREYOUDOINGFORCHRISTMASBREAK?"

Stacie turned around and looked at me, shaking her head and laughing. Severus turned and looked at me, raisin an eyebrow. "What?"

I sighed, mentally psyching myself up for asking it at a normal pace. "What are you doing for Christmas Break?"

I saw his face fall slightly. "Just going home."

"That's all?"

He nodded. "All I do every year."

"Why don't you…uh…come home with…uh…me?"

He stopped chopping and looked straight ahead. I thought I heard a squeak come out of him. "Did you just ask me that?"

"I did."

He looked over at me. "What am I supposed to say?"

"I think a yes would suffice."

"Is anyone else going?"

"Stacie and Ben are possibles, and then my cousin Grace is coming." I shrugged. "Carter tradition. We go to America one year, they come to England the next year."

"Can I think about it?"

"Of course…as long as you promise me that you will honestly consider it."

"I will."

"Okay, good." I watched him finish up the potion, and then take out a piece of paper and begin scribbling on it.

"What are you doing?" I said, peeking over his shoulder.

"Trying to write you a letter." He shielded it with his arm. "Do you mind?"

"Something you can't tell me face to face?"

"No, not that. Class is over."

"All right, everyone," Slughorn said with his normal, cheery disposition. "Class dismissed, and have a great weekend."

"Told you so," he said with a smirk. He gathered his things and took the letter with him, making sure that I didn't see anything of what was on it.

~*~

Dearest Annemarie –

I've thought about what you asked me, and I would like to say that I would love to go…but I can only worry about what your mother would think. She practically disowned me the minute I walked in the door when I saw you over the summer. I don't want to cause any trouble for you or your family (or Ben and Stacie, for that matter). I know I've probably been enough trouble already…but, for whatever reason, you put up with me. Thank you for that.

Anyway, I wanted it to be a surprise that I said yes to your offer, because I didn't want you to get all excited in class, like I know you would have. I hope you'll take into consideration what I said before you act on it.

Always,

S

~*~

Severus –

My mom can suck it!

-Annemarie

~*~

Dearest Annemarie-

I can't believe you would say that about your mother! I have to admit, though; it did make me laugh. Only you would tell your mother to 'suck it', as you said. With that in mind, I would like to make a formal acceptance of your offer. I'll have to clear it with my own mother, but I'm sure she won't mind – after all, I'll be with friends.

On the subject of Christmas, what would you like? I have no idea what to get you. And should I get presents for everyone else, as well? I've never really…you know…done anything like this, so I don't know what to do. It's all very up in the air in my mind.

Let me know as soon as you can. Christmas is approaching ever so quickly, and I would like to be prepared.

Always,

S

~*~

Sev –

Oh, Sev…you don't have to get anyone anything. No one is getting presents this year – money's kind of tight back in America, so we all decided to just enjoy each other's company and give some food to the homeless. Aunt Sarah and Grace had to scrounge together all the money they had to get the tickets to fly over to America.

Why didn't they apparate, you ask? Well, they like to fly. I think they're crazy. I hate flying. It makes me sick.

I am very glad that you said yes! I'll let Stacie and Ben know when I see them tomorrow morning.

Astronomy tower tonight? Let me know.

-Annemarie

~*~

Annemarie –

Yes.

S

~*~

"How is it that you aren't incredibly exhausted by all of our late night visits?" I asked while looking out at Orion through a telescope. It was _Beatles For Sale_ tonight, and we were both tapping our toes to 'I'll Follow The Sun'.

"Oh, didn't I tell you? I'm a bat. I live for the night."

"You're a bat now?"

Severus nodded. "Yes. I fly through the night, using my echolocation to find delicious bugs to munch on."

"Eew, gross." I moved the telescope to look at Cassiopeia. "I don't want to hear about you eating bugs."

"People eat bugs all the time. Crickets aren't that bad, really." He joined me in looking out the telescopes. I shot him a look. "What? Didn't you ever eat bugs when you were little?"

"Severus. I'm a girl."

"Some girls do it, too."

"I was a girl into princesses and frilly dresses."

"Guess you weren't one of them."

"Nope." We laughed for a little while, and then continued stargazing. We were actually up there long enough to listen to _Beatles for Sale_ six times…equaling 3 hours. I didn't expect to stay up there that long that night, since it was cold outside, and I had forgotten my robes. But, after I had commented that I was leaving, he took off his own robes and gave them to me to wear. He smelled like pine needles and sandalwood. I almost swooned.

"Thanks, Sev," I said, holding onto the telescope for dear life while I tried to will my knees to stand. "I appreciate it."

"Anything for you," he said matter-of-factly. I smiled. I had him wrapped around my little finger.

"Good. So, have you talked to your mother about coming for Christmas?"

"I sent her an owl this morning. Like I said, I'm sure she won't mind – it'll prove to her that I actually have friends." He stopped, blinking for a moment. "Should I consider them friends?"

"Not yet, but you will be able to soon, I'm pretty sure."

"All right. I'll keep that in mind."

"Good." I gazed for a little while longer, wrapping myself up in Sev's robes. It was almost like he was hugging me.

And then he was hugging me.

"I didn't realize how cold it was until I gave you my robes," he said, holding me very close to him.

"You're hugging me!"

"No, I'm getting warmth from you."

"You're totally hugging me!" I turned around and wrapped my arms around him, pulling his bony body closer to me. "And now I'm hugging you back!"

We stood like that for a few minutes, and then he spoke. "I suppose I am hugging you, aren't I?"

"Yep!"

"I guess you got me again."

I grinned with happiness. "You know you can't resist my charm."

"You're a strange one," he said, patting the top of my head with one hand, while pulling me closer with the other. "You really are."

~*~

Dearest Annemarie –

My mother said yes. It looks like I'll be joining you for Christmas break. I hope the offer still stands.

Always,

S

A/N: This story might be on hiatus for a while – I'm dong NaNoWriMo. Heh.

Bear with me! Love you guys!


	10. Chapter 9

**A/N: Sorry that this chapter took so long…NaNoWriMo!!**

**Chapter 9  
**

The morning before we were all to leave for Christmas break, I noticed not just one person looking at me from across the room in the Great Hall, but two. Joining Severus' pair of eyes was those of Lily Evans. I waved at Severus first, and then at her. She looked towards the Slytherin table, and then back to me. She smiled weakly, and waved, but didn't make any other effort to get my attention. She just stared at me.

"Lily's staring at you," Ben said, coming up behind me and grabbing one of my biscuits. I let out a "hey", but he didn't care – he just stuffed it in his mouth. "She wanted me to tell you she wants to talk to you after breakfast," he spit a piece of biscuit in my hair, but then picked it out and put it on my napkin. "Sorry."

"Gross, Ben!" I said, brushing out my hair with my hand. "Why do you always lurk behind me?"

"Because I'm the mysterious one," he climbed in next to me. "Good morning, Stacie."

"Morning, Ben." Stacie took a sip of her coffee. "What do you think Lily wants?"

He shook his head. "No idea, but she seemed pretty serious about it." He poked my arm. "It's probably about Severus."

I turned back around and caught Severus' eye. I smiled at him, waving. He waved back. I then saw Lily walk around the Slytherin table and beeline it straight to the Ravenclaw table.

"Hi, Lily," Ben said as soon as she stood behind me. I turned around slightly. She had her hands on her hips. "How's the weather over there?"

"Quite boring, since you left," She put a hand on my shoulder gently. "Annemarie…can I talk to you for a moment?"

I sighed. I knew what she was going to talk to me about. It was pretty obvious. "Sure, Lily. Let me grab a biscuit." I grabbed the one that Ben had just grabbed out of the basket out of his fingers and we walked off towards the exit. I threw a glance back at Severus, who looked like someone had punched him in the stomach. I felt bad for him, but kind of figured that this would be coming at some point.

"Okay, so," she said, pulling me around to face her. "I've noticed you've been spending a lot of time with Severus Snape. Is that right?"

I nodded, trying to stay as positive as I could. I felt like punching her in the face for the way she said his name. "Yeah, I have been. What of it?" I crossed my arms.

"Well, you know, I'm sure, that we used to be friends…and then he did what he did to me last year." She paused, sighing. "He called me a…you know…"

I put my hand up. "I know what he called you. We've discussed it. He knows my position on the issue, and he shares it as well." I tilted my head in sympathy. "He hates himself for what he did."

"As he should." She growled slightly (at least, that's what the noise she made sounded like), putting both hands in her hair. "God, it's been almost two years, and it still makes me furious."

"It makes me mad, too."

"Then why are you around him all of the time?"

"Because he needs a positive influence. Besides," I shrugged, "he's not that bad once you get passed his shell. He's actually a really genuine person."

"He's not a good person, Annemarie. You should know that by now."

The urge to punch her grew. "He is a good person, Lily. You just can't see it anymore."

"I'm just warning you, Annemarie. Please don't get angry."

"This conversation is over." I said, turning around and walking off. I didn't want to deal with her anymore. I felt bad for just leaving her like that, but I didn't feel like she would want my temper to make contact with her face.

~*~

**Hey you.**

I slid the note across the table as nonchalantly as I could. We were pretty far back in the classroom, but Slughorn's eyes were like a hawk's eyes. He could see anything.

**Yes?**

** Lily tried to talk to me again today.**

** What is she saying?**

** She's telling me not to talk to you. At all. She says that you're not a good person. She's saying that I shouldn't trust you.**

**You shouldn't trust me.**

I looked at him in shock.

**We went over this. I do trust you. You're a good person.**

**To you, anyways. **

**Stop it.**

He sighed, grabbing his quill and scribbling furiously. Several things were crossed out by the time he finished his simple sentence. He had scratched them out so furiously that I had no way of reading what he had wanted to write.

**Please, Annemarie, believe me when I say I won't let anything happen to you. Trust me. You and our friendship are too precious to me to ever consider causing you any sort of pain.**

** Severus…**

** You can listen to Lily if you want, but just know that I won't let anything happen to you. As long as we're friends, you are safe with me.**

** I believe you.**

I looked over at Severus and smiled as he read my simple answer. He looked over at me, his dark eyes glittering. He too smiled. It was in that moment that I knew I could completely trust him.

~*~

"So…" Stacie said as the three of us sat in our normal compartment. I had invited Severus to come and sit with us, but he declined, saying he needed to 'take care of a few things' before he left with us. I took that to mean he had to deal with Death Eater stuff, so I left it as it was. "How about them Bears?"

I threw one of the mini pillows at her. "You would, Stace."

"This is going to be an interesting break," Ben said, leaning back. "I can't believe I'm going to be spending nearly a month with you all…and Severus Snape." He shuddered at the thought. I retrieved my pillow and hit him with it.

"Come on, guys. He's not bad once you get to know him."

"You'll never learn, PM." Ben shook his head. "You'll never learn."

"I got him to hug me."

Their eyes got wide. "No way!" They said simultaneously.

I nodded. "Yeah. He hugged me. He's a great hugger, oddly enough." I sighed. "I felt completely safe."

Stacie made a gagging noise, and Ben joined in. I smacked both of them with the pillow. "I'll wrestle one of you guys if need be!"

"Truce! Truce!" Stacie said, blocking her face with her hands. "Please don't wrestle me! I'm on my flow!"

"Gross," Ben and I both said at the same time. "Stuff we did NOT need to hear."

"It's true, though," she said, straightening out her skirt. "It totally sucks today, too."

"Okay, no more period talk," I said, sitting down and stretching out on my side of the compartment. "Let's talk about something else."

"I'm telling you…them Bears…"

"Shut up!" Ben said, tackling Stacie and tickling her. She came back at him with a fury, tickling him twice as hard. They fell on the floor in a tickling match.

Suddenly, the door swung open…and there was Severus, standing there, watching the two of them tickle fight. He covered his eyes with a smile and turned around, giving them privacy. I could see his shoulders shaking with laughter.

"Jesus, guys! Stop it! You look like you're totally ravishing each other," I said, laughing, as I pulled them apart. They stood up, arms still raised in defensive positions. Ben was the first one to notice Severus.

"Hi, Severus," he said, eyes wide. Severus turned back around and smiled.

"Hello, Ben," he then pointed to me. "Can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Sure," I said, smoothing my skirt and walking out. Ben shot me a look of 'he-wants-to-do-you'. I shook my head with a smile, and met Severus in the corridor.

"Are you sure you want me to come along?" He asked, a worried tone to his voice. He looked as though he hadn't been sleeping.

"Are you all right, Sev?" I went to touch his face, but he swatted my hand away.

"Just some long nights. Are you sure you want me to come along?"

I looked at him in shock. "Yes, of course. Why wouldn't I?"

He stared at me for a while, and then looked down at his shoes. "Your mother doesn't like me, and I don't think your friends like me…"

"Sev," I reached for his face again, this time succeeding in grabbing his chin and forcing him to look up at me. "It's my house. I can invite whom I want over. Besides," I smiled, "my cousin really wants to meet you."

"Really?"

"Mmmhmmm. Desperately." I shot him a begging look. "Come sit with us."

He shook his head. "Come on," I grabbed his arm. "It'll be fun."

Severus looked at me with such an intense sadness that I almost fell backwards. "I can't. Not today. I have…things to take care of."

I nodded sadly. "I understand. On the way back?"

"Maybe."

I smiled. "Good enough for me."

He turned to walk off, but then turned back to me. "You're sure?"

"YES."

He put his hands up. "Okay, okay. I got it. You're sure."

I poked him on the shoulder. "Go do your stuff. I'll see you when we get off the train."

"All right."

~*~

The train ride seemed to take longer than normal. Stacie and Ben eventually fell asleep on each other's shoulders, leaving me to look out the window and think.

And think I did. I thought about what my mother's reaction was going to be. I thought about how everyone would get along. I thought about Severus and…well…just basically Severus. I thought about how ridiculous it was that I was completely in love with a guy who was working with the Dark Side.

I laughed to myself as I thought of being in love with Darth Vader. He had to have been in love with someone, didn't he? How else would Luke and Leia have been born?

Not that I wanted to have Severus' kids. That was way too soon to think about. He didn't even like me in that way, as far as I knew. I didn't know if he liked anyone in that way. I wondered if he were gay for about two seconds, and then pushed the thought out of my brain. Nope. Not gay.

"You didn't tell me you were bringing all these people home," my mother said when she saw the four of us. She smiled at Ben and Stacie, and then gave Severus a less than pleased look.

"Mother, please," I said, grabbing her arm and leading the way back to the car. "It's not that big of a deal. You know we have plenty of room for everyone."

"Maybe if they were the only ones coming over," she said, shooting a glance over her shoulder at the three of them trailing us. "But Sarah and Grace are coming too, remember?"

"I know, mom."

"And they're family."

"I know, mom."

"And…what did I tell you about that guy?"

"What, Severus?"

"I thought I told you I didn't like him."

"He's harmless. Plus, Grace wants to meet him." She stopped walking and looked at me with that motherly look. "He needs a happy Christmas. Let him have that."

"Fine. Whatever. Just don't let him too close to me."

"Okay."

"Mrs. Carter, where's your car?" Stacie asked. "My heels are starting to give me blisters." I heard the boys snicker behind me. "Hey, you guys stop it! You all don't understand!"

"We're almost there, I promise." I said, hoping it was true. I unhooked my arm from my mother's and fell in stride with Severus. I grabbed his arm. He looked at me with a hint of surprise. I heard Ben and Stacie whisper to each other. I shot them a glare, and then turned back to Severus.

"You ready for this?" I asked him.

"As ready as I'll ever be."

~*~

"GRACIE!" I yelled as I bolted up the steps. She was standing in the doorway, arms outstretched, just waiting for me to jump into them.

"ANNIE!" She yelled as I jumped into her arms. She spun me around, and then put me down. "I'm so happy to see you!"

"When did you guys get here?" I asked, grabbing her hand and leading her down towards the rest of the group.

"A couple of days ago," she said, concentrating on the steps so she wouldn't trip. She then looked up. "I had forgotten you were bringing people from school!"

"Oh, yeah, sorry." I pointed to each of them. "This is Stacie, Ben, and Sev-"

"Hi," Grace said, extending her hand to Ben. Her eyes were wide, and her mouth was open in amazement. I looked at both Stacie and Severus, who were looking at Ben. He had the same expression. "I'm Grace."

"I'm Ben," he said, grabbing her hand and shaking it slowly.

"Here, let me help you take your bags," she said, grabbing one of his suitcases.

"No, I've got it," he took it from her hand. They both giggled as their hands touched. They walked in the door together, leaving the three of us outside.

"Well," Severus said, shooting me a sideways glance, "it looks like they hit it off."

**A/N: Yay! Working on the next chapter as we speak… ^_^**


	11. Chapter 10

A/N: I needed a break from NaNoWriMo…

**Chapter 10**

Ring…ring….ring…ring…

"Mom!" I shouted, putting one of the pillows over my face. "Phone!"

Ring…ring…ring…ring…

"Aunt Michelle! Phone!" Grace shouted after me, putting the other pillow over her face.

"Older Carter women! Phone!" Stacie shouted from the foot of the bed. Since there were so many people in the house, us girls decided to share the bed in the guest room. Ben took my room, and Severus slept on the pullout couch in the living room.

Ring…ring…ring…ring…

"Goddamnit," I said, throwing the covers over on Grace and getting up, walking into the living room. I laughed as soon as I got in there. Severus was kneeling in front of the phone, glaring at it.

"Sev, what are you doing?"

"I don't live here. I can't answer it." He turned slowly to look at me, his eyes still squinting. "It woke me up."

I walked over to him, ruffling his hair with my hand, and answering the phone. "Hello?" I said sleepily, rubbing my eyes.

"You all awake?" Mom asked.

I sighed. "We weren't until you called."

"Perfect. Just wanted to wake you all up."

"We're going back to sleep after I hang up."

"Your aunt and I are going to be out all day. Don't do anything we wouldn't do. Love you." I heard the rattle of the phone against the payphone receiver and the line went dead.

"Well, aren't you a ray of fucking sunshine?" I said, watching Severus crawl back into bed and pull the covers over his head. He growled a little bit. "Not a morning person?"

"No," he said, peeking over the covers, "and I thought you weren't, either."

"I'm not," I said, slowly walking over to the pullout couch. "But, seeing someone else who isn't a morning person really makes me want to stay awake and torture them."

"You better not." He said, sitting up and glaring at me. "I'll kill you."

A small part of me was scared, but most of me knew he was joking. "You wouldn't."

"No," he said, shaking his head. "I wouldn't. But please, let me sleep some more."

"Fine, I'll let you be." I smirked at him. "But there will be torture later."

"I can't wait," he said sarcastically, throwing the covers over his head.

~*~

"Let's play 'Never Have I Ever…'" Ben said, looking through our refrigerator. Mom and Aunt Sarah had gone to sleep, and the rest of us were all awake, trying to figure out something to do.

"Michelle's not going to have that much booze in the house, Ben," Grace leaned up against Ben, stroking his arm. They had become inseparable through the time we had spent together. "Besides, I'm pretty sure Annemarie's a light weight."

"Well, considering I've never been drunk, I wouldn't know," I said, pushing Grace over. Severus giggled. "Oh shush, Sev." I pushed him too.

"Hey now," he said, grabbing my arm gently. "How do you play, anyways?"

"It's really simple," Stacie said, looking in the fridge as well. "Someone says 'never have I ever' and then they say something. Everyone who's done what they said takes a drink." She smiled. "It gets people drunk very quickly."

"It looks like all we've got is milk," Ben grabbed the gallon out of the fridge and dangled it from his finger. "Either that or water. PM, your house is boring."

"Not my fault." I grabbed the gallon from Ben's finger and handed it to Severus. "Here, you hold it."

"Uhh, ok," he replied. I went in the cabinet and grabbed five mugs, all about the same size.

"Is that Mickey Mouse?" Stacie said, pointing to one of the mugs hanging off my finger.

"Leave me alone," I laughed, leading everyone downstairs to the basement. Once we got down there, we all sat in a circle. Ben and Grace sat down next to each other, barely keeping their hands off of each other. Stacie sat next to Ben, I sat next to Stacie, and then Severus sat next to me. I grabbed the milk from Severus and filled all of the cups full, handing them all out.

"You would give me the one with Mickey on it," Severus said when I handed him the Mickey cup.

"Of course!" I smiled. He mock smiled at me, and then took a sip.

"No!" I filled it back up. "No drinks until we ask questions."

"Oh. My bad."

"All right, I'll start," Ben said, holding his cup with both hands. "Never have I ever…gotten lost in the woods at night time."

Stacie, Grace, Severus, and I all took a drink.

"My turn," Grace said. "Never have I ever…ridden a horse."

The three of us took a drink again.

"Wait," Severus asked, his cheeks slightly turning pink, "isn't this game supposed to be dirty?"

"As it goes on," I said, touching his arm, "it gets worse."

"Okay," he said, clearing his throat, "never have I ever eaten ice cream for breakfast."

"You're missing out," I said as I took a drink. Stacie and Grace joined me. "What, is it a girl thing?"

"I guess," Ben said, smiling. "You girls and your ice cream."

"Oh Ben," Grace started laughing. "You're so funny."

The three of us exchanged looks. Severus turned around, trying to hide his laughter. I lightly punched him in the arm. "All right, my turn." I sighed, closing my eyes. "Never have I ever…taken a walk during a thunderstorm."

Grace and Severus took a drink.

"Practice round is over," Ben said, his eyes twinkling. "Now it's time for the dirty stuff." He put his cup down and cracked his fingers. "Let's do this. Never have I ever…skinny dipped."

Grace took a drink.

"Gracie!" I said, shaking my head.

"What? It was with a group of girls. All right, my turn. Never have I ever…kissed a girl."

Ben, Stacie, and I all took drinks. I looked over at Severus, noticing that he didn't.

He had never kissed a girl.

But that wasn't what caught everyone's attention.

"Did you guys kiss?" Ben asked, looking at both Stacie and I. We looked at each other and started laughing.

"It was a long time ago," Stacie said, trying to back up our story. And, indeed, it had been a long time ago. We were both second years when it happened. "We were just curious twelve year olds."

"Yeah," I chimed in, my cheeks completely red. "There's nothing wrong with that, is there?"

Ben and Grace laughed. I heard Severus join in. Eventually, we were all laughing.

"All right, my turn. Never have I ever…sunbathed naked."

Grace and Ben both took drinks.

"You two are made for each other," Stacie said, rolling her eyes.

They giggled. "We know," they smiled huge smiles at each other. Stacie and I gagged.

"Never have I ever…cheated on a test."

"LAME!" I said, pushing Severus a little bit. "Come on. Give us something good."

"Fine…" he ran his free hand through his hair. "Never have I ever…kissed a guy."

"That's more like it," Ben said as he raised his mug in the air and took a long drink. Stacie and Grace joined in. I was the only one who didn't. Severus looked over at me. We had just learned something about each other – neither of us had ever been kissed by the opposite sex.

…Or the same sex, in his case. He hadn't been kissed at all.

"Do tell, Ben," I said, putting my mug down and resting my chin in my hands.

"Yes, do tell."

"I'd rather not…" He shied away from us, pouring himself another glass of milk.

"Come on," Stacie pouted and flashed him her puppy dog eyes. I followed suit, but it was Grace's face that made him cave.

"All right, all right. It was dark one night, and I thought…uhh…well…I thought I saw you, Annemarie." He started rubbing the back of his neck. "This was a while ago…I grabbed the person from behind and kissed them. It turned out to…uh…not be you."

"Who was it?" I asked.

He mumbled something.

"What? I didn't quite get that."

"Frank. It was Frank."

"L-Longbottom?" I said through my laughter.

"It was dark…and back when he had his long hair."

"Mmmhmmm," I said, getting up and putting my arms around him, "I'm sure it was dark, and it wasn't because of your undying passion for him."

He batted my arms off of him. "Get off of me! You suck."

"You like it, and you know it," I sat down next to Severus again, who looked over at me with – was that jealousy?

I shook my head. "My turn. Never have I ever…had sex in a sleeping bag."

Ben and Grace looked at each other, and then took drinks.

"Gross!" I said, grabbing one of the pillows off of the couch and covering my face with it. "Gross! Gross! Gross!"

"Jesus, you guys," Stacie said, shaking her head.

"It wasn't us!" Grace exclaimed. "We just both knew we had done that."

"Uh huh, sure," I said, throwing said pillow at Grace. She caught it with her free hand, sticking her tongue out at me. "Ben's turn!"

~*~

Everyone fell asleep downstairs except for Severus and I. We decided to go outside and stargaze. It was a fairly clear night – there were only a few clouds in the sky. Where we lived, though, didn't allow for a sharp view of the stars. The lights of London still shone in the distance, obscuring most of the stars.

"This is what makes me miss Hogwarts the most," I said as we lay down in the grass. ""The fact that I can't see the stars out in my own back yard."

"You can see Orion, at least," he said, pointing up in the sky. "I know that's your favorite."

"Ah, I guess you can." I looked over at him. He had his eyes closed. "You all right, Sev?"

"I don't want to go back," he said, opening his eyes and staring at the sky.

I rolled over on my side towards him. "Why not?"

"Because, when we go back, I have to pretend to be something I'm not." He sighed. "This has been refreshing." He looked over at me. "Do you think they like me?"

I nodded. "Stacie told me a few days ago that she didn't think you were too bad, and Ben seemed to get along with you pretty well tonight."

"Well, good. I like them." He laughed a little bit. "I like them a lot. They're fun. Much better than my friends."

"What about me?" I asked, batting my eyelashes. "What do you think of me?"

He hesitated for a little bit, and then said, "I think you're the best thing to ever happen to me."

I hoped he couldn't see me blush in the moonlight. He was so pale that I could see him blushing slightly, but I wasn't sure how dark his color actually got. We lay there, looking at each other, for what seemed like eternity, until the wind started to blow and I got a cold chill.

"You all right?" He asked, putting a hand on my shoulder.

"Yeah, I just realized how cold it was out here." I looked at my fingers. "I'm surprised that my fingers haven't fallen off yet."

"I suppose it is cold out…shall we go back inside?"

"Sure." I pulled my jacket tighter around myself as he held the door open for me. I thanked him with a smile, my mind still reeling from his comment.

Maybe Ben was right. Maybe he did like me.

"Oh, goodness, it's four in the morning," Severus said, looking at the clock on the stove. I looked at it, too, making sure he wasn't making it up.

"It doesn't feel that late," I said, taking my coat off and stretching. "I guess time flies when you're having fun."

"You should get to bed."

"What about you?"

He smirked. "I'm a bat, remember? Creature of the night."

I shouted "Creature of the night!" rather quickly. Nothing. "_Rocky Horror Picture Show_?" Nothing. "Aww…we'll have to watch that the next time you come over."

His dark eyes twinkled. "So there will be a next time?"

I smiled. "Of course there will be a next time."

"Good to know." He walked me to the guest room, leaning up against the doorway. "Good night, Annemarie."

It was in that moment that my brain disconnected from my body. I kissed him on the cheek. Just a light peck – but that was all it took to make his eyes get huge and his face to turn scarlet red.

"Good night, Severus." I smiled as I closed the door slowly. He turned around and walked back to the living room. I rested my back up against the door, running a hand through my hair, completely shocked with what I had just done.

~*~

"You two look exhausted," Stacie said the next morning when she saw Severus and I. "Did something happen while we were all downstairs?"

"No," we both said rather quickly. We looked at each other. He looked like he hadn't gotten any sleep, either. "I was too hot," he said with a shrug.

"Me too," I replied with a nod. 'Nice save.'

"I guess heat rises, whatever." We all started loading our bags and things into the car. "Hey, where's Ben?"

"There he is," I said, pointing to the steps. He and Grace were standing there, entranced in each other's eyes. Grace was crying. He handed her a piece of paper, and I could make out his lips saying 'write to me'. They hugged and kissed a million times over. "Gross," I said, helping Stacie get one of her suitcases in the trunk. "My cousin and my best friend. Who would have thought?"

"They seem like a good match for each other," Severus said, grabbing one of my suitcases out of my hand and putting it in the trunk. "Too bad they live so far from each other."

"Well, Martin and I live far away," Stacie said with a sad smile, "but we still correspond through letters. I suspect that that's what they're going to do?"

"If only there were some way of electronically sending messages," I said with a sigh.

"Yeah, that'll happen. Here he comes," Stacie said, extending her arms out to Ben. "Does someone need a hug?"

He nodded, grabbing onto Stacie with so much force that he picked her up for a split second. He ended the hug, wiping a tear from his eyes. "I think she's the one, guys." He suddenly stood up straight, putting his right arm in the air. "From this moment on, I pledge myself to her, completely and fully."

"Yeah, we'll see how long that lasts," I said, rolling my eyes.

"I'm serious," he said as we all piled into the car. "I'll do it. She's all I need." He leaned over Severus to talk to me. Severus tensed up, and then started laughing. "Annemarie, why didn't you ever tell me your cousin was perfect?"

"Because you were too busy fawning over her," Stacie said, chuckling.

"Oh, right," he said, leaning back over in his seat. I heard my mom laugh to her self as she shook her head, driving us the short drive to King's Cross station.

"You guys keep me young," she said.

"Not a problem, Ms. Carter," Ben said, putting his arms behind his head. "It's what we do."

"Now, you kids are taking your NEWTs this year, right?"

We all groaned a "yes". I looked at Severus, who looked incredibly pissed at the mention of the evil tests.

"Are you all going to do well?"

"Those tests need to die," Stacie said in a huff. "They really need to just roll over and die."

"I agree," Severus said, crossing his arms. "I'm really not looking forward to taking any of them."

"What am I going to do in Potions, Sev, when you're not there?"

"You'll do fine," he patted my shoulder. "I'll lend you my book."

"Oh, hell yes!" I hugged him the best I could. "You're the best!" I caught Ben and Stacie exchanging looks, and I stuck my tongue out at both of them. "Shut up, guys."

"We said nothing," Ben replied with a smirk. "Nothing at all."

~*~

Dearest Annemarie –

I thoroughly enjoyed the time we all spent at your house. Grace and Ben seemed to really fancy each other by the end of the holiday. I really do like your friends; with the way you pick them, I'm surprised you don't have more. I have to say; I think your mom even warmed up to me by the end of the vacation, even though she wasn't around all that much.

Anyways, I wanted you to know that I did get you a present, but I wasn't able to get it until we got back to Hogwarts. Poor planning on my part.

Hope all is going well.

Write back soon,

Always,

S

~*~

Sev –

NEWTS are killing me. I say we need to have an Astronomy tower meeting soon. I need to rant.

Annemarie

~*~

Annemarie –

Sounds like a plan to me. I would like to give you your present then, if that would be all right. You'll like it, I assure you.

Tonight at 11?

S

~*~

"11 works for me," I said, sliding in next to him in Potions. Slughorn was sitting at his desk, his head in his hands. "Check out Slughorn. He looks like he's got a hangover."

"I think he does," Severus said, leaning closer to me. "I saw him out last night while I was making rounds. He had a thing of cooking sherry in his hand."

"Must have gotten it from Trelawney." I smiled, taking my normal position of watching him work. "So, can I really borrow your book?"

"Of course." He smiled. "I wouldn't say you could if you couldn't."

"You really are something, Severus Snape."

"What do you mean?" He started crushing something that resembled a garlic clove. From the smell of it, it turned out to be a garlic clove.

"Only a few months ago, you hated my guts. Now, you want to lend me your book for the NEWTs." I rested my head on my chin. "You really are something."

"You know, people are starting to talk," he said, putting the garlic in the pot. "They're talking about how much I smile now."

"And what do you tell them?"

"I tell them it's because I'm finally happy."

My heart skipped a beat. I blushed and looked down at my hands. "Aww, Sev," I gushed, "You're so sweet."

"Well, don't let that get around, too." He fake sighed. "Can you imagine? The Daily Prophet would be reporting on that."

I pushed him lightly. "I can see the headline now – 'Severus Snape: The Sweetest Guy. Who Knew.' I'd save that article forever, just because I knew I made him that way."

"Class dismissed," Slughorn said with a moan.

"But its only 12:30," a small voice up front said, "we still have a half hour."

He rubbed his forehead. "I don't care. Go. Have fun or whatever it is you do. Just get out of here."

Severus and I looked at each other. We shrugged and got up, filing out of the classroom like everyone else. As I turned around, I saw Slughorn practically slam his head on his desk and emit a loud moan. I stifled my laughter until I was out of earshot of the classroom, and then started cracking up.

"What?" Severus asked.

"Slughorn just head desked," I said in between laughs, "He's totally hung over."

"I told you he was out drinking last night! Ha!"

"Well, what are we going to do now?" I waved Stacie over, but she shook her head with a smile, nodding towards Severus and batting her eyelashes at me. I rolled my eyes at her.

"We could hit the Astronomy Tower early," he said as we walked through the sea of people. "No one would be up there right now."

"Sounds like a plan. Let's go." I grabbed his arm and dragged him towards the staircase.

"I swear, I have so many bruises from when you grab my arms and pull me places."

"You like it, and you know it."

"I never said I didn't."

We started to climb the stairs, both of us avoiding looking at each other.

"So…how about them…umm…Wolves, is it?"

"Bears, Severus. Bears."

"Right."

We both started giggling.

"Oh! Your present!" He said, turning around and running back down the stairs.

"Where are you going?"

"Back to my room," he said, not turning around. "I'll be right back, I promise. Stay up there. Don't leave."

"Sev-" He disappeared into the corridor below and ran off. I sighed, climbing the remainder of the stairs. I pulled my robes closer to me, feeling the wind through them.

I had never seen the room in the daytime…or the view. It nearly took my breath away. I could see all across campus – from the lake to the Forbidden Forest to Hagrid's house, and back through all of the towers and buildings that Hogwarts contained. I could see tiny students playing catch with a sort of microscopic ball down below. I rested my chin on my hand, enjoying the view.

"Back," Severus exclaimed, standing at the top of the stairs with one hand on the doorway, catching his breath.

"That was quick," I turned around to look at him. He was carrying a large, square package. I pointed to it. "What's that?"

"Your…present…" he said in between breaths. I walked over to him and took it from his hand.

"Can I open it?"

"Of course." He closed his eyes and shook his head slightly, sending his hair flying. It looked as if he was trying to psych himself out of being tired. It seemed to work. "It's your present, after all."

I took a look at the expertly wrapped present. It looked as though he had taken a long time just to wrap it. "I don't want to disturb the beautiful paper," I said, running my fingers over the smooth surface.

"I'm particular with wrapping things. Please, just open it."

"Okay," I said, ripping into the paper. It didn't take me very long to figure out what it was.

He had bought me a brand new, vinyl copy of Abbey Road.

"I remembered you telling me once that 'Something' was your favorite song," he said, leaning up against the wall and smiling, "And I didn't ever remember you saying you had it. I was going to give you my copy, but it's so dilapidated that I figured I should get you a new one."

"Sev…" My eyes started to fill with tears. I didn't have it – my mom did, but I didn't have my own copy. "It's perfect." I walked over to him and hugged him. He hugged me back, holding me tighter than he ever had before.

"Thank you," I whispered in his ear.

"Anything for you."

A/N: Nawwwww! Cute and fluffy! Watch out…it'll get worse. Hee hee.


	12. Chapter 11

A/N: NaNoWriMo break!

**Chapter 11**

The NEWTs really didn't start to get to me until March. I became a mess - ignoring my hair, my makeup, everything. I had a book with me at all times, even at the table. All I did was study, study, and study some more. I began to get serious purple rings under my eyes, and they became more and more visible each sleepless night.

I wasn't the only one, though. Stacie went through the same thing. Her blonde hair became curly, which was something she had never let anyone see. Her beautiful blue eyes were now completely red, bloodshot from dryness and lack of sleep. Ben walked through the halls like a zombie, barely himself. He spent most of his time in his room, and only hung out with Stacie and I at breakfast. The rest of the time, he was either in class or studying.

Astronomy tower visits ceased for some time while Severus and I both studied furiously. At least, that's what I liked to believe was causing his sleepless nights. I knew otherwise, but I didn't want to admit it to myself. We communicated mostly through our letters, filled with rants about our various NEWT tests that we had to take, and during Potions class. That was about all we really had time for, and, even then, it wasn't much of anything.

"All right, watch me," Stacie said, during one of our breaks. We decided we needed to have a dance party in our room when we had some free time. She wanted to teach me the Robot. I had two left feet, so I figured this was going to be interesting. She put the needle on the record, and the sound of "Safety Dance" by Men Without Hats came through the speakers.

"Put your arm like this and hold," she put her arm at a 90-degree angle. I did the same. "And then your other arm like this and hold. Then repeat. Basic Robot." She did what she taught me a few times in rhythm to the music. I tried, but it didn't really do any good. "You really can't dance, can you?"

I shook my head. "I thought you knew that by now."

"Evidently not," she started mouthing the words as she continued dancing the Robot. I lay down on my bed, hair splayed all over my pillow. "I've been noticing Severus has been acting really shy around you lately."

"He's just as stressed as I am," I said, folding my hands in my lap. "It's nothing."

"I think he wants to tell you something."

I sat up in my bed. "What do you know?"

"I know nothing," she said, moving the needle back to play the song again. "I'm just saying what I've observed."

"Yeah, well, we'll see about that." I sighed. "I think he's just stressed."

"Go on and think that, but, when he tells you he loves you, don't say I didn't tell you so."

~*~

Dearest Annemarie –

I know that life is hectic right now, but I was curious to see if you wanted to meet in the Astronomy Tower tonight at 1? It's later than usual, but I have a few…things to attend to beforehand. I'm sure you understand.

I miss talking to you. I wish things could be different right now, but with all the tests we have, I suppose we have to deal with it. Listen to Abbey Road and think of me…maybe it will help.

Remember to bring a jacket tonight. It's supposed to be very cold. I'll bring a few blankets myself.

Yours,

Severus

~*~

_"Isn't Circle Center great?" I said, eating my Peanut Buster Parfait from Dairy Queen as seductively as I could. Harry was doing the same with his vanilla ice cream cone. We were having a blast teasing each other, his arm around me as we walked the Indianapolis streets.  
_

_ "I like this city," he said, biting into the cone. "It's big, but not overtly so. It's not like London."_

_ "That's for sure," I took a finger full of ice cream and put it on his face. _

_ "Hey!" He took a bit off of what was left of his cone and put it on my face. "That's what you get."_

_ "It's always nice to be somewhere where people don't recognize me, though," he smiled, his mouth full of ice cream. _

_ "I bet."_

_ He shrugged. "It's not that big of a deal, though…it's just nice to get away from it sometimes."_

_ "I understand." I threw my empty container in a nearby recycle bin and grabbed his hand. "I just like walking around somewhere with you by my side. I like to show you off."_

_ "I show you off more than you show me."_

_ "Oh, if you only knew." Just then, my phone rang. It was the intro to 'Immigrant Song' by Led Zeppelin. "Oh shit. It's Dad."_

_ "Hello?"_

_ "Can you apparate?" He sounded frantic on the other end._

_ "No, but Harry can," I replied. Harry suddenly looked very concerned. I shrugged, not knowing what was going on. "Why? What's going on?"_

_ "Severus woke up, and he wants to talk to Harry."_

~*~

"Sorry I'm late," Severus said, frantically running up the stairs with three blankets on his arm. It was about 1:15 in the morning. He wasn't wearing his robes – just a white button down shirt and some black slacks. He was shivering.

"It's fine, Sev," I said, grabbing the blankets from him, quickly putting one down on the ground and covering him with the other one. "Why aren't you wearing your robes?"

"They were taken," he said, sitting down and curling up in the blanket. I followed suit. "He's figuring out who can take the cold the best. There's a mission to Siberia coming up." He avoided looking at me, staring out towards the sky. "I'm a prime candidate."

"What?" I got closer to him, touching his shoulder. "You're not serious."

He nodded. "Yes, I'm serious. He thinks I can do it." He sighed. "I don't think I can."

"What's it for?"

"That-" he hesitated, closing his eyes. "That I can't tell you. All I can say is that it will be dangerous."

"Do you want to go?"

His head snapped up. His eyes were wild. "No! Of course I don't want to go!"

I put my hands up in defense. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to."

"I know you didn't," he said immediately after his outburst, running his fingers through his hair. I noticed how it shone greasily in the moonlight. It was normally clean. I also noticed a stick in it. I grabbed it and showed it to him. He looked down at his hands.

"Annemarie…there's something I need you to know."

My heart jumped. I suddenly felt hopeful.

"I think I'm going to run away."

I suddenly felt my blood run cold. Run away? He could never run away. If he ran away, and they found him…they could…

"Severus!" I grabbed his shoulders. "How can you even…you know what they would do if they…God!" I stood up and started pacing. The cold air didn't even affect me.

"I can't stay in," he said through his chattering teeth. "I just can't. I'm not going to Siberia. I'm not going anywhere with them. I want out."

"You're not talking sense, Sev."

"How can I?" He jumped up, the blanket falling down his shoulders. I noticed in the moonlight how thin he had gotten in the past few months – his shirt was practically hanging off of him. He grabbed the blanket and put it back around his shoulders, walking back over to me. "I only joined because Lily didn't-" He stopped himself, eyes wide.

I stopped too. "Because she didn't what?"

"Annemarie, you have to understand-"

"Because she didn't WHAT?" The word came out in more of a bark than anything. It echoed in the tower, and I was sure anyone outside could have heard it.

He hung his head and sighed. "Because she didn't love me."

I froze. So that's what it was. That's why he joined. It wasn't because he called her the M word. I was sure that was a part of it, but it was mainly because she didn't love him.

He loved her.

Tears started streaming out of my eyes.

"Annemarie, please, listen to me-"

"No!" I started to run down the steps, my vision blurred by all the tears. He didn't love me. He didn't love me. He didn't love me. I could hear him running after me, his shoes making loud noises on the stone steps. In my attempt to get away from him, my foot slipped, causing my to tumble face first onto the bottom of the steps.

"Annemarie!" He yelled, grabbing at me. He, too, fell down the steps, only he wasn't as affected by it. He jumped right up afterwards, scooping me up in his arms and cupping my face in his hand. I scrambled out of his grasp and started walking down the hallway aimlessly, sobbing the entire way. I could hear him stomping after me. "Annemarie, listen to me."

"No!" I turned around, looking at him with tears (and blood, I later realized) flowing down my face. "I don't want to talk to you right now."

"Just listen to me-" He grabbed me by the shoulders. I tried to wriggle out, but he tightened his grip, demonstrating how strong he really was. "Please-"

"Let go of me!"

"Annemarie Carter, I swear to God, you are the most difficult person I have ever met. Do I really have to spell it out for you?"

I stopped wriggling, sniffling slightly. "What are you talking about?"

"I didn't want to tell you about Lily because I knew this would be your reaction." He sighed. "I know how you feel about me."

I started to cry again. "Please let me go."

"I wanted to tell you tonight that I felt the same, but it didn't quite work out that way…"

"I guess not – wait, what?"

He smiled weakly. "I love you."

I wiped my eyes, dumbstruck. "Can you say that again?"

"I love you, Annemarie. I have for a long time."

We stood there for what seemed like eternity, in the hallway, with the candlelight flickering.

"We left the blankets upstairs," I finally said. He looked a little sad that that was all I had to say, but I couldn't quite bring myself to say it yet. I was in too much shock. I put the blanket he brought me back around my shoulders and looked out at the sky. The sun was just barely peeking over the horizon, causing the sky to become a hazy shade of pink. Severus put his blanket over his shoulders, too, and stood next to me.

"Was I wrong to tell you what I did?" He asked, his voice barely a whisper.

"No," I said, looking back over at him. "I'm just in shock right now."

"Can you say it back?"

"Maybe." I tried, but it just came out as a squeak. "I will, eventually. Just give me a few minutes."

"All right."

I squeaked awkwardly for a few more minutes before I finally yelled it out. "I LOVE YOU."

"Took you long enough," he said, moving closer to me, and putting an arm around my shoulder. I looked up at him, our faces barely inches away from each other. I could feel his breath on my face, which was coming rapidly. He was slightly shaking – from the nerves or from the cold I will never know. That's when I noticed something.

"Severus…" I said, looking deep into his dark eyes. "Your eyes are blue."

And they were. I had always thought they were completely black, but they weren't. They were just an incredibly dark shade of blue, one that I had never seen before.

They were beautiful.

The look on his face was one that I can barely describe – a look of surprise, confusion, happiness, and love. He laughed a little, and then closed the gap between us with his lips.

We kissed – our first kisses – as the sun rose, turning the sky beautiful shades of pink, orange, and yellow.

~*~

"You look out of it," Stacie said the next morning. I was sitting there, resting my chin in my hand, thinking about the night before. Well…technically, that morning. I hadn't slept. "I didn't hear you come in last night." She paused. "Did you come in last night?"

"No," I replied dreamily. I turned around and met Severus's eyes. He mouthed 'I love you' at me, and I did the same. I then turned around to meet Stacie's wide eyes. She dropped her fork. It made a loud clanking noise.

"You guys finally hooked up, didn't you?"

"Yeah," I smiled a big, dreamy smile. "We did."

"Jesus, that took forever." She picked her fork back up and dug into her eggs. "I figured you guys would have been making out by Christmas break."

"Guess it took a little longer." I took a bite of my eggs, a wave of exhaustion suddenly coming over me. "Wow. I need to sleep."

"Sleep? Who sleeps around here?" Ben slid in next to me. "No one sleeps around here, unless you're a 6th year or under. And you, my dear, do not fit into any of those categories."

"I'm sleeping during my break. I don't care." I leaned my head on Ben's shoulder, practically falling asleep. "Sleepy, sleepy, sleepy…"

"You need to wake up," Ben said, shrugging his shoulder, causing my head to rise back up. "It's not fair if you get to sleep and I don't."

"Have you talked to Grace lately?" Stacie asked, pouring me a huge cup of coffee.

"I wrote her a letter yesterday. I still have to mail it…but no, it's been a few days."

"Days?" I said, taking a sip of the hot liquid. It burnt my tongue, but the sweet caffeine started to drift through my veins, and I felt myself waking up slightly. "You guys must have really good owls."

"Yeah, I got a new one. His name is Valor. He's got the wingspan of an albatross, I swear." He sighed. "When will I get to see her again?"

"Whenever you make a trip to America," I replied, blowing on the coffee and then taking another sip. "I'm going to America next Christmas."

"Oh, yeah, that's right," He said, disappointment tingeing his voice. "Damn."

"Save your Galleons," I replied, smiling. "What time is it?"

Stacie looked at her watch. "Time for us to get to class. And, apparently, time for someone else to go to class." She smiled. "Morning, Severus."

"Good morning Stacie, Ben," he said as he put his hands on my shoulders, massaging them slightly. "Annemarie, can I walk you to class?"

"Of course," I said, spinning around and allowing him to partially lift me up from my seat. The entire Slytherin table and a section of the Gryffindor table stared at us as we walked, hand in hand, out of the room and down the hall.

"Get it girl!" I heard Ben yell as we walked out. I giggled.

"Did you see everyone who was looking at us?"

"Let them look," he squeezed my hand, "everyone was going to find out anyway."

"What? That Severus Snape is dating someone?"

"No," he stopped, turning to look at me with those black – sorry, blue – eyes. "That Severus Snape is dating the most beautiful girl in Hogwarts history."

I blushed. "You're so sweet."

"I only speak the truth when it comes to you." We arrived at my Transfiguration class all too quickly. "Astronomy tower later this week?"

"Sure. I'll be sleepy, but sure."

He smiled, kissing me on the cheek. "I love you."

"Love you, too," I said, holding my books to my chest and blushing really hard. I heard a few whispers as he walked off, and a few people were pointing in my direction. I waved at them and then entered the classroom, happy to see Stacie sitting there.

"Lily's pissed," she said when I sat down.

"I don't care." I said with a smile. And, I didn't care. I didn't care what anyone said. I had him, he had me, and all was right with the world.

Or so I thought.

~*~

Dearest Annemarie –

My love…I must speak with you about something very important. Please meet me in the Astronomy tower at midnight tonight. I'll be there as soon as I can.

You're everything to me, and nothing will ever change that. No matter what happens, I will always love you. Please know that.

Always yours,

S

~*~

"Sev, you're scaring me…" I said as Severus sat up on the ledge, swinging his legs over and letting them dangle in the air.

"I need to talk to you about something, and I want it to be a serious conversation." He looked over at me. "Please listen to me first before you say anything."

"Of course, but I'd feel much better if you came down from there and had your feet on solid ground."

"Oh, this?" He kicked his feet a few times. He looked like a child sitting in a tall chair. "Sorry. I'll get down." He swung his legs back over and hopped down, coming over to me and touching my face lightly. "Is that better?"

"Yes, much." My heart slowly went back to its resting rate. I leaned into his touch, getting closer to him and wrapping my arms around his torso. "I'm just paranoid."

"Apparently so," he whispered into my hair. "Listen, I really need to talk to you."

"Then talk," I held him closer to me, not wanting to let him go.

"After graduation…I'm…leaving."

I looked up at him, my eyes wide. "Leaving? What do you mean, leaving?"

He looked everywhere but my eyes. I knew what he was meaning. "You're running, aren't you?"

He was silent, his eyes closed. I couldn't read his expression. "You are. You're running." I pushed away from him, covering my eyes with my hands. "You're being crazy, you know that? Completely crazy. What are you going to do if they find you?"

"They won't find me," he said softly. I stopped and turned around, a skeptical look on my face.

"What are you talking about?"

"They won't find me," he repeated, walking back over to me. I backed up a few steps until I was up against the wall. His eyes searched mine, as if he were looking for something.

"How?" I whispered. I felt my eyes switch back and forth between his.

"I'm an Occlumens."

I gasped. "No way."

He nodded. "I'm really good at it, too. Really good. Practically an expert. If I run, I can block Him out of my mind. He will never find me."

It came out before I could stop it. "Then I'm coming with you."

"NO!" He yelled, backing up and walking over to the other side of the tower, grabbing the ledge and hanging his head.

"Why not?" I stood there, frozen in my spot, trying to connect my brain back to my heart, which had the microphone at the moment. "I want to come with you."

"No," I watched his grip on the ledge get harder. "You can't come with me."

"Severus…"

"I don't want to put you in danger."

"I've been in danger since I've known you."

He fell silent, realization kicking in. I was right, and he knew it.

"Are you going to say anything?" I closed the distance between us about half way.

"I never meant to put you in danger."

"I wanted it."

"Why?" He turned around. Half of his face was illuminated in the moonlight, and I could see one of his eyes was shining.

"Because I wanted you." I completely closed the distance between us, wrapping my arms around him and holding him close.

"I'll never understand that."

"It doesn't matter." I sighed. My brain and my heart were completely disconnected by now, and there was no hope of ever connecting them again. "I'm coming with you."

"I'm not going to convince you otherwise, am I?"

"No."

"I'm headed to France after graduation." He sighed. "You may join me if you wish."

"I love you, Severus."

"I love you." He kissed the top of my head. "Just promise me you won't regret this."

"Never."


	13. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

I sat in that room for five days. Five long days. I watched the nurses come in and out, checking his vitals here, putting medicine in his IV there. Every time they came in, they forced me to give up his hand. They didn't realize what that little amount of separation did to me every time.

It had been almost fourteen years since I laid my eyes on Severus. I was mentally prepared to see Lorissa older at some point, but I hadn't thought of what time would have done to him. Honestly, I thought he would have been dead by now. It wasn't until I saw his name in the Daily Prophet after Dumbledore was killed that I even knew he was still alive.

There had been times that I regretted it – the day I found out he killed Dumbledore being one of them. Being separated from my daughter, my family, my friends, day in and day out, took a toll on me, and it just made things even worse. I thought back to that night often, wondering why the hell I would have ever agreed to anything like what I did. 'Stupid teenager,' I would say, 'he didn't care about you. He didn't care about anything.'

And then, I read it. The article in the Daily Prophet after Voldemort had been defeated. The one about how Severus had actually been helping Dumbledore the whole time.

And about how he had died.

And it was then that I knew. Even through everything, he had remained the Severus that I knew. The one that I could trust. The one that I loved.

I played with the ring that was on the chain around my neck. It was his mother's engagement ring, the one he gave me the night he proposed. We never did marry – Lorissa came along before we could. We just got too comfortable as a family. It was always something we'd get around to.

And then it happened. One sleepy gaze at me, his guard down for a split second. He went out that day to get some baby food, a task that normally took maybe an hour on foot. He returned three hours later, his hair strewn everywhere and his lip split open. It all happened very quickly – there were barely any words exchanged; just tears. He went to England, I stayed in France, but moved to Versailles, and Lorissa…Lorissa went somewhere safe. My mother's in America. She couldn't stay with me, because he knew I existed. He had no idea about her, and we wanted to keep it that way.

I got up and grabbed his hand. It looked like it was cold…and it was. I ran my hand over his forehead, which was also cold. His eyelids fluttered, but they didn't open. I went over to the other side of the room, grabbed a chair, and dragged it over to the side of the bed. I grabbed his hand again and rested my chin on the bed, hoping that, by some miracle, he would wake up again and still love me.

~*~

"Annemarie…quit your snoring…" I had never woken up so quickly in my life. I wiped a little bit of drool off of the corner of my mouth and glanced up at Severus. He was not awake – he had just muttered it in his sleep. Evidently, though, I was snoring. I squeezed his hand, getting up and lightly touching his cheek with my hand.

"Sorry, darling," I said, hoping that I would get to see those beautiful, midnight blue eyes again soon, "I'll try and be quiet next time."

His eyelids fluttered, and opened slowly. He wearily looked up at me, and then blinked a few times. "…Annemarie?"

A tear slid out of my left eye as I squeezed his hand even tighter. "Hello, Severus."

He became fully aware of his surroundings. He slowly raised his hand to my face, touching me ever so lightly, as if he were making sure I was really there. "How…"

I shook my head, smiling with the joy I felt. "I don't know." I kissed his hand. "I'm just glad you're alive."

He stared at me for a few seconds, and then a look of horror crossed his face. "Lorissa…"

"She's fine. She's right outside the room." I kissed him on the forehead. "She's beautiful, Severus. Absolutely beautiful."

He leaned his head back, closing his eyes. He opened them again.

"What?"

"I was just making sure this wasn't another awful dream."

"Why would it be awful?"

"Because I would wake up, and you wouldn't be there."

I moved in and kissed him softly on the lips. I felt some wetness on his face. Pulling away, I realized he was crying. We both were.

"My mother…" He started, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. "She told me that there was a reason for me to stay here."

"What do you mean?"

"I was in a trance for a long time, just talking to her. An after effect of the snake poison, I suppose. She was the one who said there was a reason for me not to die yet; that I needed to stay on Earth for a while longer." He squeezed my hand lightly. "I thought I would never find you."

"And yet, here we are."

He smiled. "Yes, here we are."

I got up and kissed him again. I studied his face for a while. He had aged considerably, his youthful face now covered in crow's feet and sagging skin around his eyes. I could even see a few grey hairs poking through around his crown.

"What?" He asked in barely a whisper.

"Nothing," I said, smiling, "it's just that you got old."

He laughed softly. "I'll ignore that."

I sat down on the edge of his bed. He scooted over slightly, giving me room to lie down next to him. I did just that, curling up next to him like a little kitten. I knew that the nurses wouldn't be too pleased about my action, but I didn't care. I wanted to feel him next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and held me close to him.

"Annemarie…" He started. I could hear hesitation in his voice.

"Yes?"

He swallowed. "How…how much do you know?"

I snuggled closer to him. "Everything."

I felt his eyes on the top of my head. I looked up, our eyes meeting. He was trying to convey something without saying it, but I wasn't sure what it was.

"What is it?"

"You know it all…and yet…you're still here…"

I sat up, grabbing his face in my hands. "I'll always be here. I'm not leaving you."

"Even after everything?"

"You did nothing wrong, Severus."

"I killed Dumbledore."

"Because he wanted you to," I stroked his cheek. "That should not weigh on your conscience. No one is holding that against you."

Something clicked in his mind. "Where's Harry Potter? I need to speak with him."

"Uhh…" I went to the window and peeked through the blinds. "Not here. I think he went back to America with Krys."

"America?" He ran a hand through his hair. "What is he doing there?"

"Well, that's where Krys is from…didn't you know that? I thought you taught her." I smirked. "You sure did a number on her. She's terrified of you."

"Last name?"

"She's Ben's kid, Sev. It's Koromashi."

"Oh." He paused, and then his eyes widened. "She's dating Harry?"

I shrugged, smiling. "Apparently. I guess the Carter charm was too much to resist."

"Carter…charm…Ben and Grace?"

I nodded. "Yeah. Unfortunately, it didn't work out." I walked back over to him and planted a kiss on his forehead. "I'll get Ben. He'll call Krys, and they'll apparate here." I walked towards the door when he asked in a soft voice,

"Is it safe?"

I turned around and smiled. "Everything is fine now. I'll be right back."

"Annemarie?"

"Hmm?"

"I love you."

I smiled, tears in my eyes. "I love you too, Severus."

~*~

_ "My goodness, they've been in there for hours!" I said as I leaned back in the uncomfortable hospital chair. Harry and Snape had been talking non-stop for what seemed like eternity. Dad, Annemarie, and Stacie were all huddled up, talking in soft voices. There were laughs every once in a while, but it seemed mostly serious._

_ "It hasn't been that long, Krys," Lorissa said, looking at her watch. "Only an hour and a half."_

_ "What can they possibly talk about for this long?" I asked, folding my arms across my chest._

_ "They've had bad blood for a long time, haven't they? Maybe they're making up for lost time."_

_ "Well, I didn't see Harry for a year, and we've been having trouble making up for lost time…"_

_ Lorissa put her thumb and pointer finger together and rubbed them back and forth. "The world's smallest violin playing the world's saddest melody."_

_ I pushed her gently, giggling. "Shut up."_

_ Lorissa leaned in close to me. "I wonder what they're talking about."_

_ I leaned in, too. "I don't know. Maybe they're talking about us."_

_ "I don't think so," she said, looking over my shoulder. I turned around, and there was Harry, running a hand through his sexy hair. He looked like a huge weight had been lifted off of his shoulders. "I think they were just clearing the air."_

_ "Hey," I said, standing up and giving him a hug. He hugged me back, holding me close to him._

_ "Hi," he said into my hair._

_ "Everything go all right in there?"_

_ Harry broke the hug, cupping my face in his hands. "Everything went fine. We just had a lot to talk about."_

_ "I'm sure." I smiled. He smiled back. He then leaned over my shoulder and looked at Lorissa._

_ "He wants to see you, Lorissa."_

_ Annemarie's head whipped around, sending her hair flying into Stacie and Dad's faces. "He wants to see her?"_

_ "He wants to see me?" She asked timidly. She started to play with a strand of her hair._

_ Harry nodded. "Yeah. He asked for you specifically."_

_ Lorissa looked at her mom, whose eyes were wide with shock. Annemarie sighed, getting up and walking over to her with her hand outstretched. "Only if you want to, sweetheart."_

_ She looked up, her own black eyes shining with tears. "I-I want to. I want to."_

_ "Are you sure?"_

_ She nodded. "Yeah."_

_Annemarie took a step forward and then paused. "Would you like me to go with you?"_

_ "Would you?" Lorissa responded quickly. Annemarie smiled weakly, grabbed Lorissa's hand in hers, and led her down the hallway towards Snape's room. I watched them walk through the door, and then turned to Harry, who was watching me intently._

_ "What?" I asked, smirking._

_ He shook his head. "Nothing."_

_ "No, what?" I poked him on the arm._

_ "She's like your sister, isn't she?"_

_ I smiled. He caught on quickly. "In a way, yeah. I'm really protective of her."_

_ "I can see that." He put his hands behind his head and leaned back against the wall, closing his eyes. "You have nothing to worry about. Snape's not going to do anything to her."_

_ "He better not," I said, looking at Harry out of the corner of my eye, "I'll kill him if he does."_

_ He smiled. "I'd like to see you try."_

_ "You could sell tickets for it."_

_ He laughed. "People would pay to see that, most definitely. I'd make a killing."_

_We were silent for a while. I wanted to ask him about what the two of them talked about for so long, but I didn't want to intrude on the whole privacy thing. My mind shifted to Lorissa in that room, meeting her dad for the first time. I couldn't even imagine what she must have been going through._

_ And then a thought crossed my mind._

_ "Shit," I said under my breath. Harry heard, opening his eyes and turning his head towards me._

_ "Everything all right?"_

_ I looked over at him, wide-eyed. "Snape's family. He's my…he's my uncle."_

_~*~_

They looked at each other for nearly five minutes, not saying a word. I held Lorissa's hand tightly in mine. It never budged – no squeezes, no twitches, nothing. It just stayed there, basically lifeless. Her own midnight blue eyes were wide, her mouth slightly open. His face was the same. I realized how much they really looked like each other in that moment.

…Except she got my nose. Praise the Lord on that one – Sev's nose was never one of his more attractive features.

Lorissa let out a high-pitched squeak. Severus's eyes lit up for a second, and then he cocked an eyebrow. I giggled softly behind her.

"Hey," she whispered, fake punching me on the arm, "don't make fun of my squeaks." She turned back to Severus, opening her mouth again, this time to speak. "Hi," she said, her voice quivering.

"Hello," he said, his own voice shaking. I could practically hear his heart beat.

"…Can I hug you?" She asked. I looked at her with shock and surprise. He did a double take.

"If you would like."

"I would." And, with that, she practically ran over to his bedside and wrapped her arms around him. I felt tears prick my eyes as he put his own arms around her and closed his eyes. They stayed like that for a few minutes, the only sounds being Lorissa's choppy breathing from her crying.

"Mom." It took me a minute to register that Lorissa was talking to me. A tear slid down my cheek in recognition. "Come here."

I obeyed, walking over and coming between them. The three of us hugged. In that moment, we were a family – our obvious dysfunctions aside.

**A/N: Epilogue coming up….as soon as I figure out exactly what I want it to be! Sorry for the delay. NaNoWriMo drained my inspiration. Sad day. Thanks to everyone who has read and reviewed! I really appreciate it!**


End file.
